TOP SUPER-STUPID MOMENTS IN SCIENTOLOGY (PART V)

[HelluvaHoax!]

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BASED ON ANOTHER THREAD EXPLORING THE SUPER MIRACULOUS
EVENT OF L. RON HUBBARD ABANDONING HIS MEST BODY IN
ORDER TO DO ADVANCED OT RESEARCH IN DEEP SPACE
- - -

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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FROM ANOTHER THREAD DISCUSSING
"How Did You Get Rid of Your Auditing Addiction?"
- - -
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I was able to kick the auditing "addiction" that compelled me to try to become a
Homo Novis -- by simply clicking my heels together three (3) times while
repeating the phrase: "THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME HOMO-SAPIENS"


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[guanoloco]

THE WIZARD OF OZ

Zardoz - Wikipedia

en.m.wikipedia.org

 

[ILove2Lurk]

~
Electropsychometric Scouting:
The Battle of the Universes: Part II
Historic Sessions April 1952


​

The audio recording -- Electropsychometric Scouting: The Battle of the Universes Part II* -- reveals a session
where L. Ron Hubbard tries out his brand new techniques on Don Hubbard -- communicating with entities ("targs")
and asking them questions with an early E-Meter!

For an hour, he gives it a good ole college try with brother Don. He's trying to get him to communicate with nearby
entities about the origins of the universe and the actual source and nature of “targs,” those unseen harmful spirits
that inhabit human bodies. Don is not with the program at all and shortly thereafter, the following week actually, Ron
gives up on this line of research. He resurrected the research line in 1968 after he got pretty sick himself, getting
pneumonia three times within one year. The basic on all this research was 1952, however. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


* Lecture was never released to the public

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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~

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LOL LOL LOL

Operating Targ Expanded (below):

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[ILove2Lurk]

Clean Original Master Photo
From Don Hubbard Archives
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[HelluvaHoax!]

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF SCIENTOLOGY SUDDENLY STARTED
OBEYING "TRUTH IN ADVERTISING" LAWS & REGULATIONS. . .


***BEFORE***

actual cult promo


***AFTER***

***EVENTUALLY***

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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Taken from another thread discussing
a scandalous new book on Scientology's
horrific abuse of children (and others).
. . .

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There's another book expected to be published later in 2025, not listed on Amazon yet, but I was sent an advance copy. It has a picture of the famous author on the cover. (This is just the current draft of the book cover, not the final version)

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LOL!

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF SCIENTOLOGY SUDDENLY STARTED
OBEYING "TRUTH IN ADVERTISING" LAWS & REGULATIONS. . .


***BEFORE***

actual cult promo


***AFTER***

***EVENTUALLY***

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Oh wait! There's yet another wholetrack discovery. . .

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[Isaac]

 

[ILove2Lurk]

~
The Hubbard-Parsons Connection
I spent the day in an old dusty and dark bookstore in downtown Stockholm, where
I'm currently living for now. I happened upon two rare and previously unknown
books published by Don Hubbard, one in 1947 as a pulp and a reprint from 1954.
Both books were in worn condition. The cost me 9,520 SEK (just under $1,000 US).

Ron Hubbard moved into Jack Parsons' mansion in Pasadena in Aug 1945.
He joined Parsons' occult circle and participated in rituals, including the
"Babalon Working." This was a historic intersection of Hubbard with Jack
Parsons' occult workings and began what would later become Scientology.

Babalon Working was a series of occult rituals performed in 1946 by Jack Parsons
and Ron Hubbard, attempting to incarnate goddess Babalon into a human woman.
Parsons, a follower of Aleister Crowley's Thelema, believed Babalon represented a
powerful feminine force, and the rituals were intended to manifest her here on Earth.

Don, skeptical as always of his brother's antics, stood to the side and watched,
but would not take part in the mumbo jumbo these two were chanting all night,
according to his memory of events taking place at the mansion in 1945.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯



​

 

[Type4_PTS]

~
The Hubbard-Parsons Connection
I spent the day in an old dusty and dark bookstore in downtown Stockholm, where
I'm currently living for now. I happened upon two rare and previously unknown
books published by Don Hubbard, one in 1947 as a pulp and a reprint from 1954.
Both books were in worn condition. The cost me 9,520 SEK (just under $1,000 US).

Ron Hubbard moved into Jack Parsons' mansion in Pasadena in Aug 1945.
He joined Parsons' occult circle and participated in rituals, including the
"Babalon Working." This was a historic intersection of Hubbard with Jack
Parsons' occult workings and began what would later become Scientology.

Babalon Working was a series of occult rituals performed in 1946 by Jack Parsons
and Ron Hubbard, attempting to incarnate goddess Babalon into a human woman.
Parsons, a follower of Aleister Crowley's Thelema, believed Babalon represented a
powerful feminine force, and the rituals were intended to manifest her here on Earth.

Don, skeptical as always of his brother's antics, stood to the side and watched,
but would not take part in the mumbo jumbo these two were chanting all night,
according to his memory of events taking place at the mansion in 1945.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

View attachment 28357

View attachment 28356​

Several years back, Don and I were hanging out at Clearwater Beach, and he mentioned these books he authored.

When I got back home, I did a very thorough online search. I found a couple of mentions of them but couldn't find a single copy anywhere, and I was starting to wonder whether he actually wrote these books or not. LOL

I'm embarrassed now that I ever doubted the man.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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HISTORY IS TREATING L. RON HUBBARD VERY UNFAIRLY!

Why are Ron's sacred clothing relics being devalued
and degraded as merely "second class"?!

S
Second-class relics are items that were owned or frequently used by a saint during their
lifetime, such as clothing, books, or rosaries--reminding us of their holiness. These relics are
considered sacred and are venerated as a means to connect with the saint's life and example.
Third-class relics are objects that have been touched to a first or second class relic. ​

It is manifestly unjust that anything be allowed to besmirch & be-smudge L. Ron Hubbard's miraculously messianic legacy by categorizing it as anything less than "First Class".

Wait! Breaking News! The Church of Scientology's "RELIGIOUS TECHNOLOGY CENTER" just announced that
they have made the greatest archeological discovery of the past 5000 years! And it's a first class relic!

This discovery resolves the multi-millennial mystery regarding the Shroud of Turin and whether it is truly, factually
and scientifically authenticated to be JESUS CHRIST. The answer is no.

However there is no reason for anyone to feel downtone, because Scientists have made an infallible carbon dated determination and even recovered ancient DNA from the newly discovered religious relic. We now know WHO this newly discovered shroud's image is---and simultaneously WHO the true identity of Jesus Christ is.

FRAUDULENT SHROUD OF JESUS ("SHROUD OF TURIN")

SCIENTIFICALLY CONFIRMED SHROUD OF RON FROM HIS PAST LIFE AS JESUS

. . .
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[HelluvaHoax!]

Reposted from ANOTHER THREAD where the conversation
was joined by ChatGPT who engaged in "joking & degrading"
at the expense of L. Ron Hubbard and other OTs.
. . .​

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I just had an unprecedented OT WIN!

I am in my car at the moment. For the past 5 hours I have been driving around the block,
unable to find a parking space.

However, after circling the block over two-thousand times, I was stopped at a red traffic light and
glanced down at my phone when the image of my trophy came thru.

​

Within mere seconds I spotted a spot in space. A parking space!!!

This miracle is clearly a result of having seen the image of my incredibly theta trophy—
which depicts and validates me as a "Big Being"! So big in fact that I am able to hold the
entire planet in my MEST body's right hand!!!

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[Type4_PTS]

This miracle is clearly a result of having seen the image of my incredibly theta trophy—
which depicts and validates me as a "Big Being"! So big in fact that I am able to hold the
entire planet in my MEST body's right hand!!!

 

[Type4_PTS]

Most people here know that Hubbard did some auditing on tomatoes.

Less frequently known was his research on watermelons. I purchased some photos on eBay recently documenting this work.

I need someone in good standing to approach CoS to see if they'd be willing to purchase these photos. Any volunteers?

Here's one of the photos:

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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Thank you for posting that ultra-rare NEVER BEFORE SEEN photo of Dr. Hubbard in his research laboratory on this planet!

A frequent poster on this message board (Don Hubbard, Ron's twin brother) let me know that he could add invaluable context to your priceless photo discovery! We gratefully accept Don's description below as he was there in person and he was the person who took that photo of Ron and the watermelon! Not only that, but Don also revealed that he has three (3) additional photos (taken that day) in his private collection that he agreed to now share for the first time in nearly three-quarters of a century! (Don's photos & verbatim message below in BLUE)

1953: Ron scientifically contemplates how to save
billions of lives by curing world hunger. He enters a
deep theta meditative state for 36 days (without eating)...

Ron suddenly recalls that 17.4 quadrillion years ago, he had
a magical power called "POSTULATES". And at that moment
Ron's very own power of postulates is suddenly rehabilitated!!!

RON TRIES OUT HIS NEW POSTULATE POWERS!

Ron scientifically demonstrates that by simply postulating food into
existence (on this planet) he can feed everyone for eternity at no cost!

PROOF OF CONCEPT!
Using postulates alone, Ron manifests a nutritious watermelon!

"The watermelon was free, keep it so!"
—L. Ron Hubbard
​

* Dr. Hubbard has generously agreed to feed the world for free. All that is required is for human beings to enroll in his "TOTAL FOOD-DOM" program for the modest subscription fee of $5.99 per month (to handle administrative costs). Ron has philanthropically agreed to begin this 100% free program when there are at least one billion people enrolled in auto-pay.


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[HelluvaHoax!]

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A comment on cults. . .
​

The journey of discovery inside a cult (Scientology or otherwise) always has a similar ending that goes something like this. . .

" So.....um.....I mean......uhhh.....so, the savior & source of
mankind's salvation....um .... so....uhh....so...it wasn't
psychs or xenu???! Wait, does that mean that---
L. Ron Hubbard was the SP all along?!!! "
​

Avaricious cults. They have surprise endings that almost kill your ass.

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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from a discussion thread entitled—
Crowd Control: Why Scientology Members
dread being called in for a "briefing"
. . .​

"It has come to our attention that you have
a positive balance in your bank account"...

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LOL!

The Orwellian cult of scientology learned early on that it's best not to restimulate it's parishioners by using end words like "money".

def​

end words -noun: In scientology, evil trigger words that are "implanted" in humans' minds over quadrillions of years that ​

cripple god-like spiritual beings called thetans, negate all their miraculously magical powers and render them into "degraded​

beings" that live in a perpetual state of mental and spiritual hell on earth. ​

​

Therefore, scientology replaces those nightmarishly debilitating end words with new and uptone replacement words. By way of example, one would never tell a scientologist that they have a "reg cycle". Instead they would be graciously invited to attend a "...very special VIP briefing".

Likewise, in scientology staff members are taught and trained to never use the word "money". Instead, scientology salesmen are drilled to substitute euphorically euphemistic synonyms like the word "flow".

SCIENTOLOGY STAFF MEMBER
Hey, I've got great news for you. You have been selected
and invite to a very special VIP briefing that only super
upstat celebrities are allowed to attend!

SCIENTOLOGIST
Wait a minute. You always jerk me around and trick
me into going to covert reg cycles by using other words.
So, I'm going to say thanks for the cool invitation, but no thanks.

SCIENTOLOGY STAFF MEMBER
No, no, no, no, no. This time it's totally different. Nobody
is going to be talking about or asking you for money.

SCIENTOLOGIST
Sorry. This has happened too many times. I don't believe you.

SCIENTOLOGY STAFF MEMBER
No really, I promise that nobody is going to talk about money!

SCIENTOLOGIST
No. That's my answer. No, I'm not going.

SCIENTOLOGY STAFF MEMBER
Look, I guarantee on all that is holy and sacred
that this VIP briefing will never even mention
the word 'money'! I risk my entire eternity if
I am lying to you because this will come up
on my OT level eligibility auditing if I'm lying!

SCIENTOLOGIST
Jeez...well if this briefing is not about
money then what is it about?

SCIENTOLOGY STAFF MEMBER
It's about helping you get up the Bridge
to the state of full OT where you can realize
all of your wildest dreams and fantasies. It's
not about money, it's about how to
use Ron's tech of 'starting a flow'

SCIENTOLOGIST
Wait a minute. Isn't the term 'starting a flow'
just another way of saying 'donate money'?

SCIENTOLOGY STAFF MEMBER
Certainly not. Money is something in the MEST universe.
But a FLOW is only in the theta universe where
everything is super theta!

SCIENTOLOGIST
Wow, I'm so going to this briefing! I sure hope I am
not too late and I can still buy tickets for my whole family!


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END OF PART 1 (part 2, below):


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