TOP SUPER-STUPID MOMENTS IN SCIENTOLOGY (PART V)

[ILove2Lurk]

Every Scientologist is fanatically dedicated to "going to the top of the Bridge", never once noticing that there is no top to the Bridge.

Au contraire, mon ami . . . there is a certain peak state obviously visible.

​

Serenity of Beingness or Tone 40.0 on the Scientology Tone Scale represents the highest level​

of emotional tone and spiritual awareness. It represents pure thought and the state of complete​

freedom from resistance and physical constraints.​

To wit, one of our beloved OT8s manifesting serenity of beingness at full tilt out in the real world:

. . . . . .
​

Is this what Hubbard had in mind when he described OT on early tapes in the 50's?




Afterthought:

Courtesy Tom Cummins Facebook page
​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

After that unprecedented display of "SUPER UPTONE INDICATORS" the thrilled Scientologists left the gala IAS event utterly blown out, rejuvenated, rehabilitated, restored & re-dedicated to the task of planetary clearing!

AS VVGIs SCIENTOLOGISTS WALKED BACK TO THEIR
THEIR WAITING BUSSES & LIMOUSINES, DOZENS OF
VIRTUALLY IDENTICAL CONVERSATIONS WERE OVERHEARD

SCIENTOLOGIST #1
Wow! Did you see how super uptone he was?! OMG!

SCIENTOLOGIST #2
I know, he was like so tone 40 and like so exterior!

SCIENTOLOGIST #1
I could like totally feel his OT powers.

SCIENTOLOGIST #2
I know! My favorite part of the event was when
he R-Factored us about his custom OT bracelet
that is exactly the same as Minister Miscavige's!

SCIENTOLOGIST #1
Wow, his havingness is so massive that he doesn't even
worry about paying $399,000 for an OT bracelet
in solid rhodium with flawless diamonds!
That being is so unbelievably OT that
he has already escaped the MEST trap!

SCIENTOLOGIST #2
I know! And that $400,000 OT
MEST bracelet is sooooo theta!

...

​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

Quoting the previous post:

SCIENTOLOGIST #2
I know! And that $400,000 OT
MEST bracelet is sooooo theta!
​

That's one of the main reason Scientologists minds are so screwed up. . .

Because the goal of Scientology is to help each being to "escape the MEST trap". According to Hubbard, all beings have been trapped for quadrillions of years with no hope of ever escaping until he decided to visit this planet.

Well that all sounds mighty great, doesn't it? Who doesn't want to "escape the MEST trap"?

However, in order to escape the MEST trap the being must first acquire substantial prosperity and wealth within the MEST trap. Therefore, if a degraded being wants to become a "Big Being", they must first acquire Big Bucks.

Only by means of Big Bucks can one buy the Bridge to Total Freedom.

Therefore, the $399,000 MEST OT bracelet is not mest. It's "soooo theta!". It's theta because an asset worth $399,000 can buy a lot of Bridge (if it's sold).

Ergo, inside a Scientologist's mind this is the equation:

M = T = B = TF
Mest is equal to Theta,
Theta is equal to Bridge,
Bridge is equal to Total Freedom.
Therefore Mest is equal to Total Freedom.
Therefore, a MEST bracelet is soooo THETA.

Don't worry. It's Scientology, it doesn't have to make sense.
​

..

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

x

UNDERSTSTANDING SCIENTOLOGY
(read, compare and then write up your OT win!)
​

SCENARIO #1: A trembling Dorothy approaches the huge screen to speak to the Wizard of OZ.

DOROTHY
Sir, my life is a nightmare, I am trapped in a
horrifying world with flying monkeys and evil witches.
I just want to escape and go Home, can you help me?

OZ
No, you cannot just escape today, because you first
have to go back into that haunted horrifying world and stay
there—until you can bring me the broom of the wicked witch.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
​

SCENARIO #2: A trembling Scientologist approaches the huge being known as the Wizard of CAUSE (Ron).

SCIENTOLOGIST
Sir, my life is a nightmare. I am trapped in a
horrifying universe with DBs and SPs and evil psych implanters.
I just want to escape the MEST universe trap and go back
to my Home universe, can you help me?

RON
No, you cannot just escape today, because you first
have to go back into the MEST universe and stay there
in that haunted horrifying world—until you can bring me the
the cash of the suppressive and wicked Homo Sapiens.


...​

 

[Type4_PTS]

x

UNDERSTSTANDING SCIENTOLOGY
(read, compare and then write up your OT win!)​

SCENARIO #1: A trembling Dorothy approaches the huge screen to speak to the Wizard of OZ.

DOROTHY
Sir, my life is a nightmare, I am trapped in a
horrifying world with flying monkeys and evil witches.
I just want to escape and go Home, can you help me?

OZ
No, you cannot just escape today, because you first
have to go back into that haunted horrifying world and stay
there—until you can bring me the broom of the wicked witch.

- - - - -
- - - - -
- - - - -
​

SCENARIO #2: A trembling Scientologist approaches the huge being known as the Wizard of CAUSE (Ron).

SCIENTOLOGIST
Sir, my life is a nightmare. I am trapped in a
horrifying universe with DBs and SPs and evil psych implanters.
I just want to escape the MEST universe trap and go back
to my Home universe, can you help me?

RON
No, you cannot just escape today, because you first
have to go back into the MEST universe and stay there
in that haunted horrifying world—until you can bring me the
the cash of the suppressive and wicked Homo Sapiens.


...​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

LOL! Love the Zen simplicity! LOL!

DUELING WIZARDS! (all we need now is 2 banjos!)


..

 

[Type4_PTS]

DUELING WIZARDS! (all we need now is 2 banjos!)..

 

[Type4_PTS]

LOL! Love the Zen simplicity! LOL!
..

ChatGPT became better at creating images since attesting to the State of Clear. Maybe you missed it — I posted its certificate yesterday.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

Is there any actual auditor training going on now?

I think they are probably planning a massive NEW RELEASE of all the courses ever offered by Scientology. Courses where all of the grammatical errors have been eliminated.

The courses from a simple COMMUNICATION COURSE all the way up to CLASS XII, OEC, FEBC have all been made IDEAL but there is a glitch on why they cannot be released. It's because all the glorious superlative adjectives have already been used (e.g. "GOLDEN AGE" (OF TECHNOLOGY)", "100% STANDARD TECH", et al)

They have been feverishly working on what the NAME of the re-released courses will be for the past 3 years. I thought I would chip in some ideas for new names, to help the church get the flow unstuck. . .

PROPOSED NEW ADJECTIVE FOR THE NAME OF THE
ALL-NEW-AND-IMPROVED RE-RELEASED COURSES

example
THE 133% STANDARD COMMUNICATION COURSE

new marketing slogan
"33% more standard than the
crappy 100% standard tech
that didn't work"
​

..
..

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

posted by TYPE4_PTS
ChatGPT became better at creating images since attesting to the State of Clear.
Maybe you missed it — I posted its certificate yesterday.

I definitely missed it. . .
(follow-up question): "What did I do that made you think I nearly found out about it?"

..

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

THE SECRET OF SCIENTOLOGY
COMPLETION CERTIFICATES

HERE IS HIS VERBATIM SUCESS STORY (LINK) ​

"I was hesitant to do this course, as I have done two previously; however, I am so happy I did it. I really feel that I got the data this time. The course was brilliantly laid out and at the end, I felt De-PTS-ed to a large degree. Study is definitely a valid form of therapy." —Richard Reich

Interesting! Why is he doing the same PTS/SP course for a third time?
Fascinating! Why is he still chronically PTS?
I wonder what SP he missed.

ANSWER: The secret is that the cult of Scientology hides its most diabolical deeds and
covert crimes by fearlessly and audaciously announcing and hiding them in plain sight.

Yup, Richard Reich is PTS alright. But wait. . .Who is the hidden SP that he can never find?

This is one of the cult's biggest and most outrageous "withholds".

The 'expertly trained specialists' who successfully graduated
from the PTS COURSE and know how to spot SPs to alleviate
their PTS condition---are not able to spot one of the world's
most notorious anti-social personalities, criminals and
con men, the very same person who signed their
PTS/SP completion certificate—L. Ron Hubbard.



"Scientology is the world's only religion where if you get raped you are sent to the 'ethics officer',
to discover and handle your unethical behavior that caused you to 'pull in' getting raped.
And it turns out that the 'ethics officer' is your rapist". —Don Hubbard


..
​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

."Scientology is the world's only religion where if you get raped you are sent to the 'ethics officer', to discover and handle your unethical behavior that caused you to 'pull in' getting raped. And it turns out that the 'ethics officer' is your rapist". —Don Hubbard.​

​

. . . and shortly after walking into your "ethics" interview, you soon have 3 important realizations:

1. (as above) You realize that the "ethics officer" is your rapist.​

2. You realize that you are being investigated because of YOUR "out ethics".​

3. When you politely inquire if it would be possible to work with another "ethics" officer who hadn't brutally raped you, you are sternly "r-factored" that you need to "stop nattering and write up your overts on the ethics officer." At that moment, 5 large Sea Org members in black uniforms march into the room to body route you to a secure cell where you will be held under guard while you begin applying the lower ethics conditions, beginning with the "treason" formula. Before the guards exit the room and stand guard in front of your cell door, they warn you to not use your pen and paper to try to send a message to anyone or to write a Knowledge Report, because that would be a violation of the NON ENTURBULATION ORDER they just issued on you and an SP declare would result. That's when you realize that the church of Scientology might not be a church— and that "a world without criminality & insanity" might not actually be their goal. ​

​

​

..​

 

[guanoloco]

You know what's batshit stupid....

Be in any Org on staff on a Thursday before 2.

Better yet, be in HCO or something where you are part of the stat gathering and reporting team.

The amount of frenetic frantic febrile fanatic running around to collect and record a whole bunch of zeroes is hilarious.

It repeats every week.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

You know what's batshit stupid....Be in any Org on staff on a Thursday before 2. Better yet, be in HCO or something where you are part of the stat gathering and reporting team. The amount of frenetic frantic febrile fanatic running around to collect and record a whole bunch of zeroes is hilarious. It repeats every week.

There is a little known Hubbard reference on how the "Thursday at 2pm" crazed stat frenzy came into existence. . .

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

Question for the Clearwater OT Committee: Why did you let this happen?
Catastrophic 1000 Year Flood - Florida is DROWNING

This affected at least two cities in which Scientology has an organization: Miami & Orlando.

.
Pre-Clear: Church of Scientology
Action: Why Finding Session

L & N
WHY DID YOU LET THIS DISASTROUS FLOODING HAPPEN?

As OTs and big beings that always win, we needed more randomnity and a game. X

We postulated floods so that wogs could not blow us off when our
body-routers-in-row-boats pulled up to people trapped in the fast-moving flood
waters—and offered to give them a Free ride to see a Free movie in an Ideal place. TIC

Ron's sacred scripture states that our orgs only get flooded when we are winning. LFBD F/N


.
​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.
From 1950-1986 L. Ron Hubbard's scientific research culminated
in the discovery of Scientology's 100% Workable Technology
that worked for 100% of all beings 100% of the time.
Yet, Dr. Hubbard was not satisfied and he mirculously
advanced the technology to even great heights!
...

THE HUBBARD LAW OF
200% WORKABLE TECHNOLOGY
AKA: "How when the tech works it proves that the tech works—
and when the tech doesn't work it also proves that the tech works!"
​

.
example: Hubbard's scientific discovery that: "People only attack Scientology when we are winning!"
therefore: If people don't attack Scientology it is only because tech works and everyone is too busy having miraculous
wins; hence, zero interest in attacking anyone. This proves the tech works!
however: If people do attack Scientology, it is only because everyone in the cult is successfully moving up to the advanced levels and acquiring magical superpowers. Consequently, evil SPs are terrified that Hubbard's OTs will use their miraculously magnified powers to easily overwhelm and/or mercilessly vanquish them for fully illegitimate reasons--such as falsely claiming the tech didn't work and demanding a refund. This leaves the SPs no other viable option than to exponentially increase their attacks against Scientology--their attacks proving once again that the tech works!


...

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.


I was only able to watch 91 seconds of this video because the pathological lying was so hyperbolically & hideously hypocritical.

In only 91 seconds Scientology's super-OT Elena Cardone launched two (2) humblebrag moments and then literally bathed in the applause and cheers that she solicited. Here are the two wretched lies.

1. She begins her presentation bragging about how she is willing to speak at other organizations FOR NO MONEY. She doesn't bother to mention that she is not giving a speech, she is promoting Scientology. Disseminating. She's there to recruit new duped donors for the cult and she and Grant Cardone collect 10% of that cash as sales commissions (which the cult pays out in "FSM" cash rewards. Watch elena majestically wave her hands and humbly bow her head.​

​

2. Elena then thrills the audience with another "Big Lie" that she is a faithful CATHOLIC in good standing! She just happens to omit that Hubbard's "scripture" condemns Christianity as a diabolical IMPLANT masquerading as a religion. She also fails to mention that Hubbard is on record as a scam: ("...the man on the cross, there was no Christ"). Yet, in spite of Scientologist being taught that Christianity is an evil implant to enslave spiritual beings inside a hellish nightmare for eternity---she vaingloriously showers herself in admiration for being a Catholic Jesus-worshipping paragon of Christian purity.​

One mystery, however, remains. Why in the world would any adult go to hear Elena Cardone speak? What has she done that makes her worth listening to? Why is the audience breathlessly listening to her every word and frequently breaking into applause for unknown reasons?

Maybe if I did Scientology I would acquire supernatural powers and be able to confront more than 91 seconds of hearing this clowny goofball speak.


...

 

[Type4_PTS]

.


I was only able to watch 91 seconds of this video because the pathological lying was so hyperbolically & hideously hypocritical.

In only 91 seconds Scientology's super-OT Elena Cardone launched two (2) humblebrag moments and then literally bathed in the applause and cheers that she solicited. Here are the two wretched lies.

1. She begins her presentation bragging about how she is willing to speak at other organizations FOR NO MONEY. She doesn't bother to mention that she is not giving a speech, she is promoting Scientology. Disseminating. She's there to recruit new duped donors for the cult and she and Grant Cardone collect 10% of that cash as sales commissions (which the cult pays out in "FSM" cash rewards. Watch elena majestically wave her hands and humbly bow her head.​

​

2. Elena then thrills the audience with another "Big Lie" that she is a faithful CATHOLIC in good standing! She just happens to omit that Hubbard's "scripture" condemns Christianity as a diabolical IMPLANT masquerading as a religion. She also fails to mention that Hubbard is on record as a scam: ("...the man on the cross, there was no Christ"). Yet, in spite of Scientologist being taught that Christianity is an evil implant to enslave spiritual beings inside a hellish nightmare for eternity---she vaingloriously showers herself in admiration for being a Catholic Jesus-worshipping paragon of Christian purity.​

One mystery, however, remains. Why in the world would any adult go to hear Elena Cardone speak? What has she done that makes her worth listening to? Why is the audience breathlessly listening to her every word and frequently breaking into applause for unknown reasons?

Maybe if I did Scientology I would acquire supernatural powers and be able to confront more than 91 seconds of hearing this clowny goofball speak.


...

I listened for about 30 seconds, then had ChatGPT listen to the rest for me so I didn't have to.

One of the things that Elena Cardone claimed was that Hubbard discovered the Be Do Have success formula. Hubbard had a strong tendency to use the discoveries and intellectual property of others and claim it as his own. So, I asked Perplexity.ai
L Ron Hubbard taught a "Be Do Have" formula back in the 1950's. Did anyone teach it before him?

Perplexity:
Yes. Charles F. Haanel taught a strikingly similar principle decades before Hubbard, and James Allen expressed the broader underlying idea earlier still.

The closest match: Charles F. Haanel, 1912–1916​

Haanel’s The Master Key System circulated as a correspondence course in 1912 and appeared in book form in 1916—well before Hubbard’s 1950s teachings. Its opening lesson contains this statement, in Part One, paragraph 4: abebooks

“This is true because we must ‘be’ before we can ‘do,’ and we can ‘do’ only to the extent that we ‘are,’ and what we ‘are’ depends upon what we ‘think.’”abebooks

The immediately preceding paragraph supplies the possession—or “have”—component:

“The attitude of mind necessarily depends upon what we think. Therefore, the secret of all power, all achievement and all possession depends upon our method of thinking.”irp.cdn-website

Taken together, these passages give a sequence very close to “Be → Do → Have”: thinking determines what we are; what we are determines what we can do; and this underlies achievement and possession. That is a summary of Haanel’s argument, rather than an exact three-word slogan quoted from him.abebooks+1

Haanel is therefore a particularly strong answer to your question: the resemblance extends beyond a general injunction to “improve yourself” to the explicit wording “be before we can do,” placed alongside an explanation of achievement and possession.
==================================================================================================


There are also earlier philosophical roots for Be Do Have. Approximately 1850 years before Hubbard, Epictetus taught
“First, say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.” Wikisource

He immediately explains this through athletes: Olympic competitors decide what kind of competitor they intend to become, then adopt the appropriate diet, walking, and training. Different aims require different practices. wikisource

 

[guanoloco]

I listened for about 30 seconds, then had ChatGPT listen to the rest for me so I didn't have to.

One of the things that Elena Cardone claimed was that Hubbard discovered the Be Do Have success formula. Hubbard had a strong tendency to use the discoveries and intellectual property of others and claim it as his own. So, I asked Perplexity.ai
L Ron Hubbard taught a "Be Do Have" formula back in the 1950's. Did anyone teach it before him?

Perplexity:
Yes. Charles F. Haanel taught a strikingly similar principle decades before Hubbard, and James Allen expressed the broader underlying idea earlier still.

The closest match: Charles F. Haanel, 1912–1916​

Haanel’s The Master Key System circulated as a correspondence course in 1912 and appeared in book form in 1916—well before Hubbard’s 1950s teachings. Its opening lesson contains this statement, in Part One, paragraph 4: abebooks


The immediately preceding paragraph supplies the possession—or “have”—component:


Taken together, these passages give a sequence very close to “Be → Do → Have”: thinking determines what we are; what we are determines what we can do; and this underlies achievement and possession. That is a summary of Haanel’s argument, rather than an exact three-word slogan quoted from him.abebooks+1

Haanel is therefore a particularly strong answer to your question: the resemblance extends beyond a general injunction to “improve yourself” to the explicit wording “be before we can do,” placed alongside an explanation of achievement and possession.
==================================================================================================


There are also earlier philosophical roots for Be Do Have. Approximately 1850 years before Hubbard, Epictetus taught
“First, say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.” Wikisource

He immediately explains this through athletes: Olympic competitors decide what kind of competitor they intend to become, then adopt the appropriate diet, walking, and training. Different aims require different practices. wikisource

That's a good catch. However, wog tech is really behind as it's reactive.

What's not noted is the brilliant original Hubbard discovery of the success formula Have Do Be.

You see, we must Have Old Saint Hill-sized Ideal Orgs before we can Do OT 9 and 10 and Be OT 9s and 10s.