TOP SUPER-STUPID MOMENTS IN SCIENTOLOGY (PART V)

[HelluvaHoax!]

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HOW HUBBARD'S HYPERBOLIC HOAX
HIJACKS HAPLESSLY HAREBRAINED HUMANS
PART I​

1. Promises Miracles ​

2. Charges a fortune.​

3. Delivers nothing.​

4. Convinces credulously celebratory culties it was a cosmic win. ​

5. Promotes the win as scientfic proof to new marks.​

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The "Com-cycle Con-cycle" above has been well documented over the OT cult's 69 years of "operating". However incomprehensible it may be that anyone can be Dianetically duped into donating to the above delusion--it all becomes laughingly apparent, once one sees exactly how the magic trick is done.

MAGIC TRICK SPOILER: Four (4) out out the above five (5) steps are simply the stage magician's misdirection to distract you from the gimmick. I direct your attention to #4.

How exactly did crafty cult conmen (Commodore/COB) convince credulously celebratory culties it was a cosmic win?

Would you pay a half-million dollars or more to find out? A lot of people did. LOL

END OF PART I: HOW HUBBARD'S HYPERBOLIC HOAX HIJACKS HAPLESSLY HAREBRAINED HUMANS​

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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HOW HUBBARD'S HYPERBOLIC HOAX
HIJACKS HAPLESSLY HAREBRAINED HUMANS
PART II​

1. Promises Miracles ​

2. Charges a fortune.​

3. Delivers nothing.​

4. Convinces credulously celebratory culties it was a cosmic win. ​

5. Promotes the win as scientfic proof to new marks.​

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To best understand DianeticDupeTech, one first needs to get a firm grasp on the cult's concept of "win".

Scientology "wins" come in 3 categories, exactly the same way Scientologists are taught to believe that LIFE is broken down into 3 distinct categories:

BEINGNESS - DOINGNESS - HAVINGNESS ​

The Scientology Grade Chart (i.e. "Bridge to Total Freedom") only really has two (2) levels. Clear and OT.

The state of Clear has a beingness, it has a doingness and it has a havingness, examples follow:

-- A Clear's "beingness" is always happy ("uptone").​

-- A Clear's "doingness" is always productive ("upstat").​

-- A Clear's "havingness" is too vast to list, but includes such things as having perfect memory, having health (no "somatics", no abberative "engramic commands", no psychosomatic illness), et al.​

The state of Operating Thetan also has a beingness, doingness and havingness:

-- An OT's "beingness" is vast, their "calm space" is gargantuan. They exude total knowingness & total certainty!​

-- An OT's "doingness" is miraculous! They can create/levitate matter, save planets, exteriorize & travel the universe!​

-- An OT's "havingness" includes helpful things to have like infinite wealth and "eternity" itself!​

QUESTION: So how does the cult convince an ordinary "Homo Sapiens" that they have had these types of mindblowingly miraculous "wins"?

SPOILER ALERT: By declaring (to the Clear/OT) that they did in fact have those wins. And scientifically proving it to the mark by standing and wildly cheering for them. By giving them jumbo "completion certificates" (hey, it's in writing--it must be true!) and taking their photo jubilantly holding the certs overhead. By giving them OT trinkets (e.g. Clear/OT bracelets/necklaces). By giving them love-bombing and status. Validating their powers by begging them to please use their new powers to help save mankind (i.e. by recruiting other marks to pay for the same miraculously messianic powers they have).

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It feels good. That's all a Scientologist really cares about.

Hey there Mr/Miss Scientologist, how do you feel about attesting to "TOTAL CAUSE OVER LIFE"? Scientologists can get all those snazzy certificates and shiny prizes with only 5 magic words, attesting: "I feel good about it". Feeling good---isn't that the only reason they got into Scientology in the first place?

END OF PART II: HOW HUBBARD'S HYPERBOLIC HOAX HIJACKS HAPLESSLY HAREBRAINED HUMANS​

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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HOW HUBBARD'S HYPERBOLIC HOAX
HIJACKS HAPLESSLY HAREBRAINED HUMANS
PART III​

1. Promises Miracles ​

2. Charges a fortune.​

3. Delivers nothing.​

4. Convinces credulously celebratory culties it was a cosmic win. ​

5. Promotes the win as scientfic proof to new marks.​

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Over 70 years the cult would be expected to refine their gimmickry. And they most certainly have!

In the past couple decades or so Scientology has added an entirely new dimension to KSW (Keeping Suckers Winning).

There is an entirely new type of misdirection to confuse marks into believing that they have received a miracle.

SPOILER ALERT: .By cult copywriters simply mislabeling a BEINGNESS (i.e. "state") and calling it a DOINGNESS or a HAVINGNESS, the true-believing Scientologist suddenly has a huge unexpected WINFALL (it's similar to a windfall but way more theta and F/Ney!)

It's a very primitive misdirection, but it works! Normally a normal person would not believe that they had attained miraculous OT powers (e.g. levitation, exteriorization, postulating MEST matter/money into existence, et al) unless they could actuall do those things. Those are what Scientology calls "doingness".

But of course no Scientologist has ever been able to do any of the things bragged about in Hubbard's 10 million words about beings with god-like powers. If you are scratching your head now, trying to think of how the rhetorical scam works, here you go--some recent promo. It's right there, hiding in plain sight!

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Get it?

They are "DOING THEIR CANADA LEGEND"

Doing it. That's a doingness, right?

Except that "Canada Legend" is not a doingness. It's a beingness.

"Canada Legend" is a status. A pure "beingness". It has nothing to do with "do".

Cultic Conflate Tech. Someone (who cannot DO anything an OT can do) is defrauded out of their money by a conniving cult. The mark then is told they "DID" their Canada Legend. Sure sounds like a doingness--that only an OT can do! Jeez, if I did that I must have an OT power! Whoa, I therefore must have attained OT!

Ergo, by simply dreaming up meaningless STATUSES (beingness-es) the cult can convince its customers that they attained OT powers. That's a huge win!

CONCLUSION: The cult does what Hubbard always did. He made up WORDS and sold them. His most profitable words were "Clear" and "OT", people paid him over 2 billions dollars for just 2 words. That's a helluva lot more profitable than when he was a science-fiction writer being paid 2 cents a word!

END OF PART III: HOW HUBBARD'S HYPERBOLIC HOAX HIJACKS HAPLESSLY HAREBRAINED HUMANS​

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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This is not an OT win.

"Did Her" (Canada Legend)?

No, sorry--she did not do anything.

The only "Did Her" is that the cult did her
(and she F/Ningly forfeited ungodly amounts of cash and 51 years).

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[JackStraw]

I, quite early on, had that wog-nition. (or is that a bog-nition?)
Yet I stayed on...oh well.

After hearing multiple times "You have to BE ot to GO ot!" I thought: Why don't I just BE ot and skip all the rigmarole involved in GOing ot!" And I did!

Jack

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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Always attack "worked" until the internet came along. Now it is a boomerang that delivers endless foot bullets. So many foot bullets their feet are ... hmm, well they ain't got no feet left, that's how many.

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Ain't that the (acceptable) truth!

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ACTUAL POLICY
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"Always attack!"



ACCEPTABLE POLICY
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"When In Doubt Attack! Communicate!"

When someone is critical or upset, simply
always attack them use the ARC triangle to bring them uptone.

All conflicts are caused by
evil enemies that need to be attacked and destroyed
a 3rd party that our theta third party tech can so easily resolve.

"Attacking Communication is the Universal Solvent"

Scientology is helping mankind to start stop attacking
each other because our goal is
"A World Without War"

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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Scientology's sacred "scripture" teaches that lying is "the greatest good" for mankind. Thus, naturally, Scientologists lie about and hide Hubbard's sociopathic "always attack!" policy from wogs, each other--and themselves.

They even lie about lying---and call it "acceptable truth".

PRO TIP: When reading anything from Scientology, be sure to always get the original unedited draft.

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What Is Greatness?
by L. Ron Hubbard​

The hardest task one can have is to continue to attack love his fellows despite all reasons he should not.​

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A primary trap is to succumb to invitations to not attack hate. ​

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True greatness merely refuses to change in the face of bad actions against one—and a truly great person attacks loves his fellows because he understands them.”​

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To do one’s task without attacking becoming furious at others who seek to prevent one is a mark of greatness—and sanity. And only then can one be happy. ​

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Seeking to achieve any single desirable quality in life is a noble thing. The one most difficult—and most necessary—to achieve is to attack love one’s fellows despite all invitations to do otherwise.​

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True greatness merely refuses to change in the face of bad actions against one—and a truly great person attacks loves his fellows because he wants to destroy understands them.​

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When cruelty in the name of discipline dominates a race, that race has been taught to hate. And that race is doomed.​

The real lesson is to learn to attack love.​

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Happiness and strength endure only in the presence absence of hate. To not attack hate alone is the road to disaster. To attack love is the road to strength. To attack love in spite of all is the secret of greatness. And may very well be the greatest secret in this universe.​

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L. RON HUBBARD​

Mankind's Greatest Attacker Friend​

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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Nominated for one of the STUPIDEST MOMENTS in the history of Scientology:

The moment Scientologists have "huge wins" after making mega-donations to their scientifically philosophical religion--because they are Keeping Scientology Working. Yet. . .

• Their "bank" is "keying out" from donating, despite it having nothing to do with getting auditing/training.
• Their mega-wins are the result of taking mega-loans.
• The borrowed funds will put them in overwhelming debt if not bankruptcy.
• Contrary to "safeguarding their eternity" all the creditor obligations will ruin their future.
• Despite insolvency, they are borrowing and giving it to a cult with billions of extra/unused cash in banks.
• They think they are "flowing power to power" but they are actually flowing power to their own financial doom.
• They write "success stories" and speak at fundraising events in glowing praise of KSW, even though KSW is defined by strict and literal obedience to every word of every policy; and, Scientology financial policy makes it a "crime" and "suppressive act" to borrow money and/or do things that harm Scientologists.
• Despite all of the above winning & grinning, the Scientologist ends up in financial ruin. They are then r-factored that the reason for their "ruin" is that they failed to follow Ron's financial tech, which is "OUT-KSW". They are then ordered to buy the KSW COURSE and other Scientology Finance hatting courses, none of which they can now afford---at which moment they once again are compellingly convinced/coerced by the cult into borrowing even more.
• When it all ends in personal disaster, the Scientologist at least is consoled by the knowingness that they (per policy) "exchanged in abundance" and Kept Scientology Working. And they have scientific proof of that and the fact that Scientology "exchanged in abundance" with them too---a shiny KSW lapel pin!

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[guanoloco]

Here's what's stupid:

Honest Beings Have Rights.

But in Scientology that's not true. What's true is that Scientology covers for criminals and keeps Honest Beings from reporting the criminals to the cops. That's why Danny Masterson can rape with impunity. It's why pedophiles get away with it and their victims are blamed with what they did to pull it in or entice the pedophile to begin with.

A perfect example is Mary Sue going to prison for cleaning Ron's files and ultimately being relegated to the dumpster for putting Ron in danger.

The only "beings" that have rights in Scientology are the crims.

This is right in line with Scientology creating a world without war by declaring war on numerous enemies, having an "enemies" list, declaring people as being in a condition of enemy, having battle plans and war chests and conducting business as usual through a paramilitary Navy.

 

[Irayam]

Wanna know what's really stupid?

A does factually equal A.

Yes!
It has always bothered me. A=A=A is correct.
A=B=C is not correct...
Or am I lost in some MU?!?

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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SUPER-STUPID DU JOUR: Scientologists believing themselves to be the "elite of the elite, most ethical, most able beings on the planet". One wonders why they are so self-congratulatory when they also believe that they were dumb enough to be tricked into coming to live on and becoming hopelessly entrapped/ imprisoned in a "degraded slave planet"

Scientologists! They are "more able" than other deluded Ponzi victims. To wit, the "more able" their cult leader is to defraud them, the the "more able" the OT mark is to believe they have made gargantuan "gains".

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PONZI MARK: "Wow, I achieved a huge return on my investment, the gains are miraculous!​

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SCIENTOLOGY MARK: "Wow, I achieved a huge exchange on my donation, the gains are miraculous! ​

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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Wow. I got out of scn in 1981. I was a Permanent IV (I think equivalent to a Grad V now) and...........(snipped):

Interesting word in Scientology---permanent. . . hmmm.

def.
permanent - adjective: 1. (Scn) see synonym at "eternity". 2. (Scn) lasting a standard duration of time and/or until an advanced being uplines obnoses a previously undetected technical outpoint, which when corrected results in more gross income.

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[Karen#1]

As time rolls forward and the delusional ads and proclamations (noted well on this thread and Mike Rinder's blog) I come to this conclusion:

THE CULT IS DRAMATIZING A EUPHORIC FALSE SENSE OF CERTAINTY AND TOTAL INVINCIBILITY

LOLOLOLOL

The cult believes it can BE anything, Do anything and HAVE anything and spouts great ideas on creating huge empires of Scientology. Bah !
(This has been re-enforced by the recent Clearwater acquisitions of Real Estate)

But the most destructive part of this delusional state is the convincing of others into investing their time and money in the big grandiose ideas of "salvaging this sector of the universe"

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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After hearing multiple times
"You have to BE ot to GO ot!"
I thought:
Why don't I just BE ot and
skip all the rigmarole involved in GOing ot!"
And I did!​

LOL. Perfect.

That "OT Stable Datum" just helped inspire its reverse corollary:

"You have to GO db in order to BE ot!"​

That's why the only Scientologists who attain "Total Freedom" (from the toxic cult) are the ones that became "more able" to blow and get declared, proving:

"You have to GO sp in order to BE in pt."

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[JackStraw]

Is that the Hoaxology Law of Commotion?

Love it!

Jack

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

THE CULT IS DRAMATIZING A EUPHORIC FALSE SENSE OF CERTAINTY AND TOTAL INVINCIBILITY

The cult believes it can BE anything, Do anything and HAVE anything and spouts great ideas on creating huge empires of Scientology. But the most destructive part of this delusional state is the convincing of others into investing their time and money in the big grandiose ideas of "salvaging this sector of the universe".

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Exactly!

That's what Scientologists are indoctrinated into "religiously" believing. That's why every Scientology family happily pays over a million dollars to get the prize inside the Crackerjack Box----the supremely miraculous OT power to POSTULATE!

It's quite marvelous, messianically mystical and magical to be able to instantly BE, DO & HAVE anything you want!

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[HelluvaHoax!]

But the most destructive part of this delusional state is the convincing of others into investing their time and money in the big grandiose ideas of "salvaging this sector of the universe"

​

That brings up something that is an award-winning Stupid Scientology Moment!

Which is more stupid?

1. The idea of hopelessly defrauded hoax victims marching around in fake naval costumes, pretending that they have the power to "Salvage This Sector of the Universe"?​

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2. The hopeless idiocy of no Scientologist ever asking Hubbard (or themselves): "So if we are salvaging this sector of the universe, what is happening in the rest of the universe?​

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Didn't Hubbard carefully explain to Scientologists that it was mandatory to set up a "SAFE SPACE" to deliver OT levels? Isn't that why a ship had to be purchased and Scientologists were required to journey to the "FLAGSHIP" out on the ocean and pay 1,000 dollars an hour for exclusive rundowns that could not be delivered any other place on this enturbulated slave planet?

If only this "SECTOR" needs to be salvaged, doesn't that mean that the REST of the universe is already handled? So Ron, if it's so cool in the rest of the universe maybe we should all just drop our bodies and go hang out there instead, right?

Wait, he did that already. Dropping dead is such an awesome OT power, everyone please rise and face the wall portrait of the mentally ill con man in the naval costume--and applaud, cheer and jubilantly chant: HYP-HYP-HYPOCRISY!

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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BEFORE APPLYING "TRUTH IN ADVERTISING" TECH





AFTER APPLYING "TRUTH IN ADVERTISING" TECH

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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Is that the Hoaxology Law of Commotion?

Love it!

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LOL

Actually you may have discovered yet another Scientillogically self-evident truth!
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THE HUBBARD LAW OF
HYPERBOLICALLY HYPOCRITICAL HOAXES

"Big Lies ensure Big Beings have Big Wins!"
(but only after Big Bucks are paid for Big Tech Estimates)

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[guanoloco]

Is that the Hoaxology Law of Commotion?

Love it!

Jack

Parody of The Locomotion
Songwriters: KING, CAROLE/GOFFIN, GERRY

Everybodys doin the brand new tech now
We call it baby the Hubbard Law of Commotion…
Everything he says is a total reversal
Come on baby Hubbard’s Law of Commotion…

You think he’s the savior he’s the biggest SP
If you want enslavement try his version of free
So come on, do Ron Hubbard’s Law of Commotion with me…

You think you’re free you're caught in the chain now
Big, better, best let’s do the PTS

A chugga chugga commotion trains on Venus now
Brag, bully, boaster let’s ride this rolly coaster

Flow Ron all the power give him all of the control
It’s all about the MEST claiming it’s all about the soul
So come on, do Ron Hubbard’s Law of Commotion with me

Him seeking the truth is one of his lies
Just like there never was a second when he talks about his wives
Come on do Ron Hubbard’s Law of Commotion with me

For every single reference there's an equal and opposite answer
You don't smoke enough if you got lung cancer
Come on, baby, do the Hubbard Law of Commotion

The reg will Crush Sell ya til you physically hurt
They say they make Big Beings while their leader's a squirt
Come on do Ron Hubbard's Law of Commotion with me