a penny a word turned into a penny a BT, billions of them. LOL.
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TOP SUPER-STUPID MOMENTS IN SCIENTOLOGY (PART V)
- Thread starter HelluvaHoax!
- Start date
I told you I was trouble
Suspended animation.
Yeah ... and we all know exactly what they worship!
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NotsoNutsoNow
Active member
El Con may have also been working on percentages, just like a bookie:
'an estimated twenty-two percent of the cases treated receiving temporary relief'
(Ref: The Dianetic Auditor's Bulletin Volume 2 No 5 November 1951 A BRIEF HISTORY OF PSYCHOTHERAPY.)
The twenty-two percent also works in with the 20/80 or 80/20 rule.
I guess he figured that if he could scam 1 in 5 marks and charge those ill-fated enough he could make a healthy living.
HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
.
At ground zero of it's international hoax, Scientology's street-level gimmick is the "Oxford Capacity Analysis" ruse.
What better way to bait the Total Freedom trap than with a Totally Free Personality Test!
Oddly, every single one of the hundred million OCAs administered since the 1950s has the identical results and r-factor:
When DIANETICS began making the world's first Clears the identical Personality Test was still used on Clears, but the r-factor after every test had to be slightly tweaked.
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At ground zero of it's international hoax, Scientology's street-level gimmick is the "Oxford Capacity Analysis" ruse.
What better way to bait the Total Freedom trap than with a Totally Free Personality Test!
Oddly, every single one of the hundred million OCAs administered since the 1950s has the identical results and r-factor:
EVERY OCA TEST EVER SCORED
"You have a very bad personality which is ruining your life
because of engrams--
But, we can help you with that.
The OCA dissemination angle was so specularly successful, that Scientology now has over 20,000,000 members and is the world's fastest growing religion! They have the scientific proof of this and you only need to personally go inside one of their Ideal Orgs so they can share it with you."You have a very bad personality which is ruining your life
because of engrams--
But, we can help you with that.
When DIANETICS began making the world's first Clears the identical Personality Test was still used on Clears, but the r-factor after every test had to be slightly tweaked.
EVERY OCA TEST EVER SCORED ON CLEARS
"You have a very bad personality
which is ruining your life
because of BTs--
But, we can help you with that.
When SCIENTOLOGY began making the world's BT-free OTs, the identical Personality Test was still used on OT VIIIs, but the r-factor after every test had to (again) be slightly tweaked."You have a very bad personality
which is ruining your life
because of BTs--
But, we can help you with that.
EVERY OCA TEST EVER SCORED ON OT VIII's
"You have a very bad personality which is ruining your life
because of LFs--
But, we can help you with that.
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LFs -noun: (abbv) Linoleum Floors. Pursuant to L. Ron Hubbard's discovery that the single source of all of mankind's suffering (i.e. disease, war, insanity, criminality) was the "engram", said engrams were audited out and mankind immediately ceased all manner of suffering. However, quite shockingly, mankind once again began suffering and war, disease and insanity began to occur again. Dr. Hubbard faced the daunting challenge and made an even more illustrious discovery--that the single source of all mankind's suffering was not really engrams, but BTs. As expected, these Body Thetans were rather easily audited out and mankind flourished and prospered with unprecedented happiness for eternity. Alas, even though the planet had been saved, there were still billions of homo sapiens who had not yet been handled, thus the embers of war & insanity once again burst into flames and the planetary threat of extinction threatened all life. All hope was lost, because by that point Dr. Hubbard had moved off his Commodore post to other parts of deep space and the nightmarish reality of mankind's collective doom rested on the courageous shoulders of Dr. Hubbard's successor (and 2nd greatest OT in the universe, COB. As unlikely as it was, COB made yet another miraculous discovery that was the "WHY" that the planet had not been saved. COBs meticulous research determined that approximately 99% of Scientology Clears & OTs blew because of lack of results (exactly as predicted by Dr. Hubbard in "Keeping Scientology Working"). This happened because the tech (which always works 100% of the time) was only working 1% of the time due to the tech not working optimally in a non-optimum MEST space. Clinical trials were conducted which determined that 100% of the miraculous gains from Scientology would happen 100% of the time if the MEST was upgraded in the org so that Italian marble covered the auditing room floor instead of down-stat, down-tone linoleum. Without these upgrades, the orgs would fail! And if the org's failed, the planet could not be Cleared! And if mankind wasn't cleared, the planet would once again be overwhelmed with war and insanity. Thus, even total cause OT VIII's would become total effect and lose their eternities. Unless of course the OT VIII took responsibility for the out-tech by donating all their MEST money to the Ideal Org program. "You have a very bad personality which is ruining your life
because of LFs--
But, we can help you with that.
.
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HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
.
Good post!
Hey, those last 2 questions were rhetorical (as if asked of a staff member) right? Or were you asking me? In the unlikely event that you were inquiring about my case state, I probably had best answer---lest I be routed to the Ethics Officer for refusal to answer a standard auditing question, lol.
ANSWER: I did go Clear and OT! By some cosmically strange reason, the day I blew from Scientology is the very first day (since learning about Scn) that Engrams & BTs no longer had any effect on me.
When the org sent recovery teams to handle me and get me back on the Bridge, they assured me with blinkless r-factors that I hadn't actually attained the states of Clear & OT; that I had merely and temporarily "keyed out" my bank. They quite graciously offered to show me the LRH references on this when I came back into the org. They even generously volunteered to drive me back to the org so I didn't have to waste money on Uber. These are really nice people!
However, I still had doubts about going back so I politely declined, but thanked them for their concern about my "eternity". As I opened my front door to show them out, I was shocked to discover that they had stationed one of their OT VIIIs at the door to block the exit.
He was a very odd fellow who never stopped grinning.
Good post!
Hey, those last 2 questions were rhetorical (as if asked of a staff member) right? Or were you asking me? In the unlikely event that you were inquiring about my case state, I probably had best answer---lest I be routed to the Ethics Officer for refusal to answer a standard auditing question, lol.
ANSWER: I did go Clear and OT! By some cosmically strange reason, the day I blew from Scientology is the very first day (since learning about Scn) that Engrams & BTs no longer had any effect on me.
When the org sent recovery teams to handle me and get me back on the Bridge, they assured me with blinkless r-factors that I hadn't actually attained the states of Clear & OT; that I had merely and temporarily "keyed out" my bank. They quite graciously offered to show me the LRH references on this when I came back into the org. They even generously volunteered to drive me back to the org so I didn't have to waste money on Uber. These are really nice people!
However, I still had doubts about going back so I politely declined, but thanked them for their concern about my "eternity". As I opened my front door to show them out, I was shocked to discover that they had stationed one of their OT VIIIs at the door to block the exit.
He was a very odd fellow who never stopped grinning.
He opened up his wallet and showed me his ID card. . .
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Hello! I am Billy Blowdown, the org's Director of Wins. Can I offer
you a free Success Story form now that you have
completed your Bridge Debug cycle?
HH
I'm not de-bugged. I'm not going back with you to the
Ideal Org because by blowing, I already feel I have
attained Total Freedom.
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Yes, I heard you explain that. But what if I can prove
to you that the states you achieved are only temporary?
What If I can scientifically prove you still have
unhandled charge that can ruin your life?
HH
Scientifically prove it? How exactly are you going to do that?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Come with us to the Ideal Org where we have new Ideal meters
that will react when we check if you have more engrams & BTs.
HH
And what if the meter doesn't react?
Then will you agree to give me a jumbo completion
certificate that states that I am the first Scientologist in
history that successfully handled their bank so I
never again need to buy any more auditing?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Sure, we'll give you that cert! But first we have to
make sure there isn't some other reason that
the meter is not reading.
HH
You mean like if the meter isn't charged or something?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Yes, exactly. A meter might not react if it's uncharged
or perhaps if the being is over-restimulated and their
bank is so solid that nothing is reading.
HH
Really, then what would you do?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Oh, it's quite simple actually. If nothing reads on your
case, we'll keep you in a safe space until you destimulate.
Then things will begin reading again on the meter.
HH
How do you know that?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Trust me, everyone gets a lot of meter reads
after they spend a few weeks destimulating in
in the enturbulation-free environment discovered
by Ron called a chain locker.
.
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Hello! I am Billy Blowdown, the org's Director of Wins. Can I offer
you a free Success Story form now that you have
completed your Bridge Debug cycle?
HH
I'm not de-bugged. I'm not going back with you to the
Ideal Org because by blowing, I already feel I have
attained Total Freedom.
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Yes, I heard you explain that. But what if I can prove
to you that the states you achieved are only temporary?
What If I can scientifically prove you still have
unhandled charge that can ruin your life?
HH
Scientifically prove it? How exactly are you going to do that?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Come with us to the Ideal Org where we have new Ideal meters
that will react when we check if you have more engrams & BTs.
HH
And what if the meter doesn't react?
Then will you agree to give me a jumbo completion
certificate that states that I am the first Scientologist in
history that successfully handled their bank so I
never again need to buy any more auditing?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Sure, we'll give you that cert! But first we have to
make sure there isn't some other reason that
the meter is not reading.
HH
You mean like if the meter isn't charged or something?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Yes, exactly. A meter might not react if it's uncharged
or perhaps if the being is over-restimulated and their
bank is so solid that nothing is reading.
HH
Really, then what would you do?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Oh, it's quite simple actually. If nothing reads on your
case, we'll keep you in a safe space until you destimulate.
Then things will begin reading again on the meter.
HH
How do you know that?
BILLY BLOWDOWN
Trust me, everyone gets a lot of meter reads
after they spend a few weeks destimulating in
in the enturbulation-free environment discovered
by Ron called a chain locker.
.
NotsoNutsoNow
Active member
Great writing HH.
HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
from another thread discussing the CoronaVIrus
and how Ideal Orgs miraculously remain open with immunity.
Based on an article in today's UNDERGROUND BUNKER headlined by
‘PROTECT THE ORG’ is Scientology’s
highest purpose says new edict
- - -
and how Ideal Orgs miraculously remain open with immunity.
Based on an article in today's UNDERGROUND BUNKER headlined by
‘PROTECT THE ORG’ is Scientology’s
highest purpose says new edict
- - -
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
posted by Karen #1
Here’s the latest word from Los Angeles, where Scientologists are told that although “public” (meaning non-staff Scientologists) are encouraged to do extension courses while they are isolating in their homes, Scientology’s facilities are still open and operating, and that members on site for advanced courses continue their cases rather than go home.
The result is this totally unclear message from Valley “OT Ambassador” Kathy Welch that suggests staffs are still working, and “OT” Scientologists are still on hand for upper-level auditing at Los Angeles facilities.
And the number one priority for all Scientologists, she says, is “PROTECT THE ORG.”
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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Scientology is an extraordinarily caring and responsible religion. They care deeply.
That's why they long ago vowed to protect mankind---by clearing the planet.
Thereafter they gave their duty-bound oath to protect your eternity---by selling you the Bridge to Total Freedom.
Finally Ron made all staff members swear by sacred scripture that they would protect the org---by staying open 16 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
One would have to search this planet far and wide to ever find another organization so tirelessly dedicated to protecting. They've even by-passed the mafia and become The World's Fastest Growing Protection Racket.
.
HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
.
QUESTION: How exactly does Scientology "protect" the planet and "protect" the Scientology orgs during such pandemic threats as the Coronavirus?
ANSWER: Advanced Technology!
BACKGROUND: Since the very beginnings of Dianetics & Scientology in 1950, the one thing that solved all of Scientology's problems was its advanced technology. Let's review a few key moments. . .
THE ADVANCED TECH IS ALWAYS ADVANCING!
1950s
THE M-METER
- MATHISON -
1960s
THE A-METER
- AZIMUTH -
1970 - 2019
THE E-METER
- ELECTROPSYCHOMETER -
2020
THE C-METER
- CORONAVIRUS -
CLEANING UP THE PLANET WITH ADVANCED DIAGNOSTIC DEVICES
Blowing BPC! (bypassed contamination)
Blowing BTs! (body temperatures) ..
Blowing BVs! (body viruses) .
SCIENTOLOGY TECH CAN BLOW ANY UNWANTED CONDITION!
THAT EXPLAINS WHY 99% OF SCIENTOLOGISTS PERSONALLY USE THE
BLOW TECH TO BLOW THEIR MOST UNWANTED CONDITION---SCIENTOLOGY.
.
QUESTION: How exactly does Scientology "protect" the planet and "protect" the Scientology orgs during such pandemic threats as the Coronavirus?
ANSWER: Advanced Technology!
BACKGROUND: Since the very beginnings of Dianetics & Scientology in 1950, the one thing that solved all of Scientology's problems was its advanced technology. Let's review a few key moments. . .
THE ADVANCED TECH IS ALWAYS ADVANCING!
1950s
THE M-METER
- MATHISON -
1960s
THE A-METER
- AZIMUTH -
1970 - 2019
THE E-METER
- ELECTROPSYCHOMETER -
2020
THE C-METER
- CORONAVIRUS -
CLEANING UP THE PLANET WITH ADVANCED DIAGNOSTIC DEVICES
Blowing BPC! (bypassed contamination)
Blowing BTs! (body temperatures) ..
Blowing BVs! (body viruses) .
SCIENTOLOGY TECH CAN BLOW ANY UNWANTED CONDITION!
THAT EXPLAINS WHY 99% OF SCIENTOLOGISTS PERSONALLY USE THE
BLOW TECH TO BLOW THEIR MOST UNWANTED CONDITION---SCIENTOLOGY.
.
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what's funny about the OCA test, even at the beginning if you took it, and let's say all your personality traits were above 0 on the graph,
Why you were deemed tweety weety.
LOL
HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
.
You just exposed one of the cult's favorite gimmicks!
Here's something that would be fun to do:
-- hire a dozen or so actors and hook them up with hidden surveillance cam
-- have them casually walk near an Ideal Org so that body routers pounce on them
-- Half a dozen actors know all the RIGHT answers to the OCA and the other half-dozen know all the WRONG answers. Thus, half the tests score at the bottom and the other test all score across the ideal top of the chart in every category.
-- Then film the "modern science of mental health" experts go over their results.
-- Especially the perfect ones!
What would they say? Well, they have to say (in a nice way) that the person is "out of valence". This is Scientologese for "schizophrenic". Two personalities. In Hubbard's hoax, out of valence means that the person is unwittingly acting like another person they once encountered. They have taken on all of their mannerisms and characteristics.
One of the more famous "valences" ( "beingnesses" ) is the WINNING VALENCE. It is the appearance and manner of someone who is always winning---someone like the supremely supernatural L. Ron Hubbard or the total cause David Miscavige. It's someone who knows it all, like Tom Cruise. Or someone who has it all, like Grant Cardone. These are the biggest "winners" in Scientology---and the people that are held up as the IDEAL BEINGS that all Scientologists pray and postulate to one day become.
What do you say to a person who scores perfectly on the Personality Test?
I was never involved in the "OCA TESTING LINE" so anyone who knows what the standard patter is when dealing with an "out of valence" person who is in the "winning valence" of an uptone happy person. But who really has serious and t tragic problems that are ruining his/her life. Please weigh in if you know what THOSE BIG WINNERS are told to help make them feel like losers--who now desperately need to "handle their ruin"!
I am very curious how they covertly invalidate a person who already has the "IDEAL OCA SCORE" that all Scientologists are paying a half-million dollars to acquire.
.
HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
posted by Guanoloco
There's a wise saying:
There's a wise cult saying:
.
There's a wise saying:
Feed a man a fish and you've fed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish & you've fed him for a lifetime.
.There's a wise cult saying:
Feed a man a fish and you've fed him for a day.
Teach a man fishy "do fish swim" tech & you've fed a mankind's greatest friend for a lifetime.
.
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To answer your questions.
I was on the HCO recuiter line which we did OCA's, IQ, and Leadership tests to tell if a person was eligible for staff. Anybody that scored high wasn't "ruined", but we tried to persuade them to join the winning team, sort of love bombing. Why we would say you are a genius, you have great leadership skills, and a great personalty, you need to help mankind as we have the only technology to help mankind. We need the elite like you since your test scores are high.
Little did I know at the time, but this is rhetoric taught to me by Hubbard, the art of persuasion.
HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
.
Thanks so much.
But wasn't there some kind of special "handling" that was done when a prospective PC had an OCA all across the top?
I could be majorly mistaken, but i always thought the registrars (or Div VI folks) had some way of talking to an "Out Of Valence" person who believed themselves to be at the top of that chart. I mean, the "valence" was pretending to be uptone, in a "mimicry" of a real Clear/OT, right?
I hung out mostly in tech/qual so i never paid much attention to the OCAs of anyone. It seemed irrelevant and meaningless to me as a C/S, despite the apparent reliance some case supervisors had in trying to make the PC's OCA go "up".
But, am I mistaken about those "fake" high OCAs? I am pretty sure the r-factor was not "YOU'RE OUT OF VALENCE DUDE!" but wasn't there something that was said to them to get those poseurs down from their high horse? LOL
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Karakorum
千差万別
Were you pressured to have these guys sign up for the Comm course, or were you allowed to steer them to some other course?
NotsoNutsoNow
Active member
Love your work HH. At different times in my life, I thought about superpowers I would like to possess. Being able to be invisible would be pretty cool. Able to read peoples' minds, likewise, especially women. I have always wondered what they’re really thinking, ha ha. Reminds of the time I was lining up to see the movie 'What Women Want'. Lo and behold in the queue just in front of me I see God. Overheard Him talking. He was informing people that He wanted to know, too, ha ha. But like most former $cientologists I would love to be able to turn back time - just like Cher - and never have anything to do with the cult!!! I wonder if the cult can deliver me any of these workable superpowers – and deliver what’s promised – not Delusional Bullshit from a Suppressive Psychopath. That’s the only Fair Game I want to play.
Karakorum
千差万別
Based on many years of research and numerous dangerous experiments that I conducted mostly at my office (but some also at the van Allen belt), I think I can offer an approximate simulation using google images:
NotsoNutsoNow
Active member
Ha ha
Bill
Well-known member
A good friend of mine was a recruiter using the OCA line. He bragged that one time, when confronted by a very high OCA simply turned the graph upside down and told the guy "Scientology can help you with that!"
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HelluvaHoax!
Well-known member
.
.
Those were rather illuminating narratives about the Bridge experience! On that topic, here is an excerpt from Don Hubbard's (see avatar) bestselling book:
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Those were rather illuminating narratives about the Bridge experience! On that topic, here is an excerpt from Don Hubbard's (see avatar) bestselling book:
THE CREATION OF HUMAN HAPPINESS
-A Concise History of Happyology -
-A Concise History of Happyology -
- Scientist promises a Bridge to Total Happiness.
- People spend fortunes and 25 years to attain Total Happiness.
- Despite a jumbo certificate with the word "HAPPY" on it, they are still unhappy.
- Scientist researches this complaint and discovers the reason.
- Breakthrough is celebrated, people purchase new advanced level 3, the Wall of Unhappiness.
- People move thru the Wall of Unhappiness, but still feel unhappy for some strange reason.
- People invest fortunes/decades more on expanded Wall levels (4,5,6,7 & 8).
- Despite a super-jumbo certificate with the words "SUPER-HAPPY", they are still unhappy.
- People interested in refund cannot locate scientist who has closed lab and moved off grid.
- New Scientist makes another huge discovery, that all prior customers are evil and/or insane and nobody should talk to them because THEY are the actual cause of unhappiness (which is totally handled on the next level).
- Happyologists rejoice that they can now become happy by purchasing/doing Wall levels 9 & 10.
- New Scientist delays release of the miraculous key to happiness levels until the lab buildings are all remodeled with marble floors--requiring additional billions of dollars and decades to achieve.
- Happyologists happily sell all their earthly belongings and bury themselves in loan debt in order to take responsibility for the remodeling that will guarantee their happiness, at some point in the future.
- Happyologists, still unhappy, are advised to "Act happy and soon you will find something to be happy about" which restores their hope they will eventually attain Total Happiness--and that makes them feel kind of happy--so that confirms that the HappyTech is working.
- Happyologists who, despite all the above HappyTech, still do not feel happy are sent to ethics to find and disconnect from the SP that is causing their unhappiness (SP = Sad Person). By eliminating all contact with SPs, Happyologists are always surrounded by winning happy people and thus they can continuously rehab each other's happiness by sharing happy success stories.
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