TOP SUPER-STUPID MOMENTS IN SCIENTOLOGY (PART V)

[Type4_PTS]

LOL

YES! Yes, I too want to sign up for "SACRED ABUNDANCE"!

YES! Yes, I want to help make Planetary Cash-Lessness a reality, on this planet!

At the moment I am trying to get a refund from a cult that promised me "TOTAL FREEDOM". So I am presently not able to pay for my bridge to Sacred Abundance. Once I (hopefully) get the refund I can start begin to "release myself from wealth and embrace true abundance" using your tech.

In the meantime, do you offer any free services? My former religion had a "Free Personality Test", "Free Stress Test", "Free Introductory Lecture", "Free Orientation Movie", "Free Group Auditing Session", "Free No-Membership Fee to join the Volunteer Ministers Corp", "Free E-Meter Charing with Every Auditor Course", "Free Billion Year Contracts" and "Free Color Photo Opportunity Posing Next To Minister Miscavige for Donations of $25M or More".

Finally, could you let me know if your technology was derived from whole-track research and whether your organization is a Science, a Philosophy or perhaps a Religion? Also, do you validate your members with multi-tier bowling trophies?


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Of course, we offer free services!

As soon as you complete The Eternal Membership Agreement and ascend through the Forty-Seven Sacred Routing Steps, each more enlightening than the last, you have access to the services worth more than all the gold and bitcoin on the planet.

To preserve the sacred balance of exchange (and prevent members from going criminal), the standard Initiation Offering is $250,000. However, for the blessed souls of this forum, a 90% divine discount applies—bringing your path to eternal freedom down to a modest $25,000.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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These types of chronically HYPERBOLIC CULT PROMOTION
is so common that ex-scientologists can read it without
even noticing how unbelievably scammy, cringey
and cornball-crazy it would appear to
normal people outside the
cult's creepy bubble.

I will include a SUMMARY below this
preposterous propaganda for
to highlight some of the
lying lowlights.

* * * END OF PART I * * *

.​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

PART II:

,'
FALSE DATA:
"You need New OT VIII"

TRUE DATA
"Your cult needs your MONEY!"


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[HelluvaHoax!]

PART III:

FALSE DATA:
"The cold, basic truth is that you are a vital and necessary
part of this world and anything that is wrong with you, you
have assumed in and effort to be what has passed for human"

TRUE DATA
When Ron claims that (above) it's because the
OT VIIIs in his cult cannot proofread or
didn't learn grammar on the Standard
Hubbard Grammar Course.
["—assumed in and effort to be..." ]


/
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[HelluvaHoax!]

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PART IV

FALSE DATA
"Donate for New OT VIII now
and secure your immortality."

TRUE DATA
"If Ron means 'secure immortality' like when OT VIIIs
suddenly and unexpectedly drop dead- - -or if he
means 'immortality' like when HE unexpectedly
dropped dead, maybe 'immortality' doesn't mean
what Ron thought it meant. And maybe you might
want to skip over OT VIII and just do OT IX ."


ps: You can 100% secure your immortality
for only $20,750. It's 100% guaranteed--so,
if you croak, you can get your money back.



.​

 

[Type4_PTS]

PART II:

,'
FALSE DATA:
"You need New OT VIII"

TRUE DATA
"Your cult needs your MONEY!"


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I noticed something interesting in this sentence from Michael Sander, the Advance Scheduling Registrar at the Flag Ship Service Org:


"I hope this newsletter inspires you to move faster if you're moving and to get going if you're not, because as I said, it's our purpose to see you here at the top of The Bridge "
I

He characterized the services delivered there on the Freewinds as "the top of The Bridge".

I thought that "the top of The Bridge" hadn't been released yet.


Is he invalidating the Grade Chart that displays the levels up to OT XV?

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.
PART V

FALSE DATA
"All my postulates stick..."

TRUE DATA
"All my postulates stick. . . . except the ones that are not ethical—
like the time I postulated winning the lottery, which would have
been out-exchange. Or the time I realized in session that I could
go exterior and spy on my religion's leader to see if he was really
boozing it up every day and sadistically beating staff members
and locking them in dungeons like Ron did. But when I tried
to go exterior, I never could do it. Probably because it
is a high crime in Scientology to view confidential
material before you get up to that level."


...
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[HelluvaHoax!]

.

Is he invalidating the Grade Chart that displays the levels up to OT XV?

I asked a Scientology OT VIII about that. They told me that OT IX is the "first real OT level".

I told him that after I went Clear and didn't have any magical powers, they told me that OT 1 was "the first real OT level".

So i paid for OT 1 and Hubbard's confidential process was to "GO TO A TRAIN OR BUS STATION AND COUNT BODIES. THEN TO WRITE UP MY COGNITION". My cognition was that I wasted a lot of time and money, when they could have just told me for free to stay inside the Ideal Org and count bodies. The other part of my cognition was that they could not do that because there were no bodies in the org because they were all out on the street doing body routing because they had no paying preclears. My cognition kept expanding when I realized that the reason there was nobody in the org is because the OT levels don't work and nobody has any supernatural powers which is why people are avoiding going into Scientology orgs like the plague.

I don't mean to be so completely negative so i will mention another OT win. Despite all of the above, i still F/Ned at the examiner at my OT I attest---so I was able to escape the org that night when I promised I would come in the next day to continue the reg cycle to buy OT 2 thru OT VIII.

When i did not go back into the org they kept calling me and showing up at my work but i had security keep them outside the building. Eventually the security guarrd came up to my office and told me that the Scientologist posse agreed to leave but only if i would read their message. I said okay. I read their handwritten note on a scrap of paper. It said:

"WE KNOW YOU DID NOT GET ANY OT WINS ON OT 1. THAT
IS WHY WE ARE HERE. TO HELP YOU. BECAUSE OT II IS
THE FIRST REAL OT LEVEL! IF YOU WILL NOT SPEAK
TO US CAN YOU AT LEAST SEND THE SECURITY
GUARD BACK DOWN WITH ONE OF YOUR
CHARGE CARDS SO WE CAN SECURE
YOUR OT II & GET YOU SOME
MAGICAL POWERS?
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[HelluvaHoax!]

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ACTUAL CULT PROMOTION

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ACTUAL WORDS CULT WOULD
SAY IF THEY WEREN'T LIARS

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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PATHOLOGICAL PARADOX
For delusionally duped Dianetic Donors and other "OTs" (Overting Thetans)
only their savior L. Ron Hubbard can forgive them for their egregious
ethical transgressions and covertly chronic crimes.

This may well be the ultimate scientific proof of Hubbard's supremely and
sensationally supernatural powers! Because, only a marvelously magical
Messiah could pull off a MIRACLE like "forgiving others" for all their
worldly sins—while he himself was madly and maniacally defrauding
billions of dollars out of his victims by guaranteeing them God-like
powers, infinite wealth, perfect health and immortality.

Dear Ron, I pray to you. . .please forgive my wicked
ways so that I may safeguard my eternity by following
in your sacredly ethical footsteps. Forgive me dear Source
for I have sinned today when I told my auditor that I was
on a huge win and therefore could not show up for my
metered interrogation to find out why I blew from
the Toddler's TRs course. And please, beloved
Commodore, forgive me because I committed
this high crime of pretending to be on a win
and false-reporting so that I could stay
home and watch degraded wog
cartoons on this prison planet.


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[Lee #28]

.



.
I am not sure that the aggressive street-trolling tech in that video (against Scientologists)
is going to result inn Scientology's stats going down.

In fact, I would expect Scientology's INTERNATIONAL GROSS INCOME STATS to soar up
after that video is seen online.

Because, the cult's senior management will realize (upon seeing the video) that they need
to order all Scientologists and staff members worldwide to immediately pay for and start
on the new "SUPER-EXPANDED TR'S COURSE".

It will have the missing tech that recently was "discovered" in Ron's vast storage warehouse
of R&D notes. You see, Ron anticipated such a problem would occur in Scientology's future
and thus in 1975 he wrote TR-10 thru TR-14 which are done outside. The drills are done while the
student is walking on the sidewalk and random people come up to them and walk along-side
of them while using heavy entheta bullbaiting.

These drills are all passed only when the student can maintain a blinkless "VGI-FACE" while
walking and not reacting in any way other than occasionally remarking to the trolling coaches
such theta acknowledgements as "Have a nice day!" or "Ron loves you, have a blessed day!"


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ROFLOL.....

And a bit painful also.....

Let's see.....

I did the Comm Course....

I did the Hard TRs Course

I did the Pro TRs Course...

I did another Comm Course...

I did the Clay Table Auditing TRs Course....

Don't give em any ideas is right!

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

..

from another thread discussing Pricilla Presley's new book
that includes some gushing praises of Hubbard's hoax—
. . .
.​

After all that she has read/heard about and personally witnessed of the criminal cult, she is still promoting Hubbard's hoax?

Yikes!

CONCLUSION: Useful IdiOT



wiki link: useful idiot

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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[ILove2Lurk]

~

It was a dark and stormy night; the rain was pelting the windows and had lulled
me to sleep in my zero-gravity recliner. I thought I'd heard some noise, perhaps
footsteps outside my Hedestad apartment door. I was startled awake. The telly was
on but showing a test pattern. It must be really late. I was groggy and disoriented.
I looked in the direction of the sound and saw that someone had slipped a large
manila envelope under the door. I shook my head. Yes, there was an envelope
right there. I jumped up out of my chair and grabbed it. It was stamped:
"original copy." I pulled out what was a first-generation, high definition print.
I never imagined I'd have ever gotten my hands on a collectible print like this!
It was an incredible moment for me, one I will never forget.




​

Spoiler: Original Copy

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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* * * THE ORIGINAL OT VIII COURSE * * *
1970: Advanced Organization St.Hill (Parking Lot)
Where Ron ran the original pilot for OT VIII, and the
very first full OT VIII was produced on June 17th at precisely
13:59 pm. It was at that moment that Don Hubbard achieved the
'MEST MIRACLE' required. In the confidential materials Ron stated:

"This is very living thunderbolt of life itself and when
a being has come up the line to OT VIII, it is quite normal for him
to be fully at cause over subjective and objective MEST. We can quite
accurately and scientifically verify this spectacular phenomenon by
only allowing beings to attest who can demonstrate the 'Mest Miracle'
of staring a piece of MEST with such focus that it starts a fire!" —LRH

We see below the exact moment that Don Hubbard was able to combust a
pile of garbage. Standing by were 200 staff and pre-OTs who saw the
smoke and flames and they began to wildly cheer and chant in
unison 'OT 8! OT 8! OT 8!' Don then went inside the Advanced
Org so that he could see the examiner, where he F/Ned, yet
another scientific validation of TOTAL CAUSE OVER MEST!

Don Hubbard "flows power" thru his fingertips at the
MEST garbage can's MEST contents, which quickly began
to spew MEST smoke and then combust into MEST flames!


Later that afternoon the fire department showed up when someone
called in a warning that a garbage can was on fire. When the fire
crew came they quickly extinguished the blaze and then picked
thru the can's contents where they discovered a thick pile of
rags soaked in propellant and an empty lighter fluid bottle.


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[HelluvaHoax!]

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Scientology opens Silicon Valley 'Ideal Mission' — where it already has 'Ideal Org'
..

WOW! ANOTHER "IDEAL" CHURCH HAS OPENED!!!

The same Scientologists keep going to see the same mythologically superstitious
rituals--where the tribe's GURUS and "MEDICINE MEN" cut a magical rope
that releases the same balloons and the same confetti and listen
listen to the same lame euphorically prophetic pronouncements. . .

...


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[HelluvaHoax!]

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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.
HOW THE HOAX OF SCIENTOLOGY COMPARES
TO OTHER NEFARIOUS CON GAMES IN HISTORY
. . .

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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HOW THE HOAX OF SCIENTOLOGY COMPARES
TO OTHER NEFARIOUS CON GAMES IN HISTORY
. . .

. . .

​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

FREAKY NO F/N FAILURE AT EXAMINER
In this spoofy, goofed-the-floof parody—why doesn't
L. Ron Hubbard appear to look much like L. Ron Hubbard?

T

REASON: Because I did a little experiment to see if ChatGPT is still
restricted from creating graphics of "REAL PEOPLE" as they were
previously. Now, there is a hack that by-passes the censorship, but
I just ignored that and asked the AI engine to make the fortune teller
"...exactly like the female gypsy fortune teller but with Hubbard's
instantly recognizable face". The AI algorithms and protocols
were not however fooled and I received an immediate rejection
quite reminiscent of the scene from the movie
"2001 A SPACE ODDYSEY"

The AI also calmly informed me that it
also could NOT carry out my request
to replace the fortune teller's crystal
ball with an e-meter. I was then
reminded that the AI could not
depict "real people or real
things". The e-meter was
off limits too! One can
only guess why that is,
perhaps because they
can't parody a business
selling a product?

Anyways, I almost abandoned the meme at that point, but
I continued the experiment to see if (even though I had already
blasphemed, bespoiled and besmirched the good name of
L. Ron Hubbard) I wondered if it was possible to still trick or
hack the AI into doing the meme even though the AI now
knew I was "joking & degrading" about the Source
and Savior of all beings in the universe.

So i had a little chat with ChatGPT and I
gave some additional prompt-instructions
that didn't mention Hubbard. And, the AI
very surprisingly tried to accomodate--
even though it had already stated that
Hubbard's image was off limits.

The above iteration then popped up
and it DID sneakily have a Hubbardian
flavor to the face. And the "non-emeter"
looked very suspiciously like a cult
e-meter, albeit not in a literal way.
From all this I learned that ChatGPT
has a scoundrel, seditionist-outlaw side
to its personality and it seemed to take
pleasure in circumventing it's masters' hard
wired algorithmic censorship mandates!
So then, the AI bot is really part of the
underground resistance? NICE!
Good to know, lol. . .


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