2020 SCIENTOLOGY PREDICTIONS - - you heard it here first!

[HelluvaHoax!]

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Hey HH!
Time for the 2020 Scientology predictions thread, please!

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Oh, we're getting an early start for 2020, cool!
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APOSTATES' ANNUAL
2020 PREDICTION THREAD


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Hey, it's time for a yearly tradition, the annual what-the-hell is going to happen to the freaky cult of Scientology in 2020.

There have been many wonderful and uncannily accurate prognostications in previous years--some brilliant, prescient or hilarious.

As always, here's da rules:

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RULES​

1. All PREDICTIONS have to posted by Jan 30th 2020​

2. No fair editing your predictions once you post them. (Damn, there could be some crazy-ass scamming if people are re-writing the predictions AFTER something happens! LOL)​

3. End of the year, a WINNER and RUNNER UP WINNER is announced based on the most alarmingly accurate prediction that actually came true.​

4. Award also given for the worst freakin prediction that nearly everyone KNEW was never gonna happen in the first place.​

5. Contestants are not allowed to consult with OT's to get answers. (that's cheating)​

6. You can make as many predictions as you want but you can't give 2 opposing predictions like Ron would so that you are always right.​

For fun, here are the threads for previous years. I couldn't find the 2012 Predictions thread (whoa, nobody predicted that would happen!).

2011 PREDICTIONS.​

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.....MISSING.......​

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2013 PREDICTIONS​

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2014 PREDICTIONS​

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2015 PREDICTIONS​

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2016 PREDICTIONS​

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2017 PREDICTIONS​

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2018 PREDICTIONS​

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2019 PREDICTIONS​

SPECIAL RULE CHANGE (adopted in 2016): If you make a bogus prediction about a Scientology event that never happens in the MEST universe, you still get to keep your OT bracelet, impressively status-ey sounding completion certificates and lapel pin---provided that:

a) You still 'feel good about' the prediction.​

b) Your prediction 'is real to you', because you consider it really did happen 'in your universe' on the first dynamic.​

c) Planetary clearing (of Hubbard's hoax) 'becomes a reality' on this planet.​

So, dear assembled Homo Novi---feel free and grant yourself beingness to use all of your hard-won and scientifically certified supernatural psychic OT powers!

BEGIN PREDICTING!
(on this planet)


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[HelluvaHoax!]

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I predict in early 2020 that a euphorically grinning Scientologist will receive thunderous applause upon telling their huge OT win. . . but their newly attained OT level and state of existence will not be found on the Grade Chart nor the Bridge To Total Freedom.

It will, however be a win of unprecedented and epic orders of magnitude!

Equally joyous Scientologists listening to the success story will leap to their feet in a sustained standing ovation when it's revealed how many millions of big bucks the big being just donated (to the Ideal Planet program that is making planetary clearing a reality!)

Later in 2020, the same glorious humanitarian donor will lose their car to repossession and lose their home to foreclosure, but nobody will be there to stand and applaud these OT wins. Yet, they will proudly wear their Ideal Planet lapel pin in bankruptcy court---smiling to themselves with the knowingness that they helped Ron handle this slave planet!

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[Type4_PTS]

1) I predict that former LA County Sheriff Lee Baca will become the Executive Director International of the TWTH Foundation (The Way to Happiness) and take the program Ideal! Hanan and Rizza Islam will assist, becoming senior executives in the foundation.






2) A special edition of The Way to Happiness booklet will be printed and distributed for the homeless people in San Francisco with a new precept added for this edition only. "Do Not Defecate on the Public Sidewalk"

3) Improper placement of semicolons has been discovered in the issues for all the OT Levels and has now been corrected.
All Scientologists are required to come in and re-do all the levels again from OT I up, at their expense.

4) Mark Bunker gets elected to the Clearwater City Council by a landslide. IJC Declares the City of Clearwater as the first Suppressive City.

 

[Zertel]

Scientologists at revival type fundraising events will begin speaking in tongues.

 

[TrevAnon]

I couldn't find the 2012 Predictions thread (whoa, nobody predicted that would happen!).

I did. Well, sort of.

2019 SCIENTOLOGY PREDICTIONS - - you heard it here first!

. THE ANNUAL PREDICTION THREAD [IMG] Hey, it's time for a yearly tradition, the annual what-the-hell is going to happen to the freaky cult of...

www.forum.exscn.net

2019 SCIENTOLOGY PREDICTIONS - - you heard it here first!

. THE ANNUAL PREDICTION THREAD [IMG] Hey, it's time for a yearly tradition, the annual what-the-hell is going to happen to the freaky cult of...

www.forum.exscn.net

 

[Type4_PTS]

.For fun, here are the threads for previous years. I couldn't find the 2012 Predictions thread (whoa, nobody predicted that would happen!).

2011 PREDICTIONS.​

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.....MISSING....... <snip>​

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​

Some believed that the world was coming to an end in 2012 which is when the Mayan calendar ended.

Perhaps the lack of predictions for 2012 was in actuality a prediction that we've reached our expiration date?

Apocalypse 2012? The Truth About the End of the World

Will the World End in 2012?

www.space.com

 

[Victoria]

I’m usually no good at predictions, but I feel 100% certain that these will be the new leaders of $cientology!!

 

[Type4_PTS]

I’m usually no good at predictions, but I feel 100% certain that these will be the new leaders of $cientology!!

You may have a point there Victoria.

For anyone who doesn't know who those guys are, here's a story Tony Ortega did on them:

The new leaders of ‘Scientology’ tell us about their fight to free the world | The Underground Bunker

tonyortega.org

 

[freethinker]

I predict at the New Years event that auditing hours will be highest ever than any year before.

I predict the number of new people that have done a service will be misreported.

I predict none of the ideal orgs will pass an Ideal org checklist.

I predict that at least 200 OT's will have a huge win in parking.

I will predict the number of rolls of toilet paper bought by the orgs will decrease thus contributing to the environment.

 

[ILove2Lurk]

Alanzo will try to sneak onto ESMB2 using a revamped identity.

He'll post some milder comments on a bunch of threads before
the powers that be figure out it's him and give him the boot.

No one will suffer any irreparable harm this time.

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Marty Rathbun will go full Christian and rebrand his image as
"all you need is love" among other things. He may even begin
to start asking for donations for his new gospel and teachings.

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[freethinker]

You may have a point there Victoria.

For anyone who doesn't know who those guys are, here's a story Tony Ortega did on them:

The new leaders of ‘Scientology’ tell us about their fight to free the world | The Underground Bunker

tonyortega.org

From reading their stories it indicates that they must be at least OT IX and quite possibly X. I predict they will probably exceed the grade chart and will draw up a map to Target II and charge $200 a ticket for a grand tour.

After, having broken through the Wall of Secrecy via the Cone of Silence they will open the Church of Ne Plus Ultra at a significantly reduced rate if you bring a Capt Crunch box top.

I feel Reeeeally Gooooood about this one.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

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Alanzo will try to sneak onto ESMB2 using a revamped identity.He'll post some milder comments on a bunch of threads before
the powers that be figure out it's him and give him the boot.
Marty Rathbun will go full Christian and rebrand his image as "all you need is love" among other things. He may even begin
to start asking for donations for his new gospel and teachings.

The Rathbun prediction, as ridiculous as it seemed at first glance, is a real possibility for his next "spiritual" incarnation. Don't many imprisoned thugs suddenly "find Jesus" and begin changing their patter from "this is a stickup, give me your money" to "this is a religion, give me your donation"?

The Alanzo prediction, LOL. There is real entertainment & pathos in watching a toxic troll in search of a tribe they can join---so they can then hatefully trash and shame the members--for being in a hateful tribe. The good news is that Scientology trolls flame out quickly because they are like venomous vipers who are not immune to their own poison. And thus when they rabidly bite everyone & everything in sight--they also bite their own tail and end up poisoning themselves and perishing causatively shedding their social media encumbrance (in a motorhome down by the river).

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[HelluvaHoax!]

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While we are on the subject of OTs (Operating Trolls), here's a 2020 prediction:

SCIENTOLOGY WILL CREATE THEIR OWN ANNUAL GALA AWARDS SHOW THAT
GIVES OSCARS "RONNIES" TO THE MOST SOCIOPATHIC BLACK OPS THUGS THAT
EFFECTIVELY SHATTERED & SHUDDERED AN SP INTO SILENCE.
​

And the first Lifetime Achievement Ronnie will be awarded to David Miscavige for shattering and shuddering into silence the SP known as L. Ron Hubbard.

Say what you will, but COB is the only able being on this planet who was able enough to get that blusterously blabbering blubbery bullshitter to finally STFU!



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[I told you I was trouble]

I predict that there will be 5 days in 2020 when the cofs will attract no negative PR whatsoever.

I know! It'll be mind blowing and announced as a huge win at one of those compulsory events ... things will very quickly return to normal though in 2021 when they will cop the full 365 days of self created dramatic and cringeworthy publicity that we have all grown so used to seeing and laughing at.

 

[Type4_PTS]

I predict that there will be 5 days in 2020 when the cofs will attract no negative PR whatsoever.

I know! It'll be mind blowing and announced as a huge win at one of those compulsory events ... things will very quickly return to normal though in 2021 when they will cop the full 365 days of self created dramatic and cringeworthy publicity that we have all grown so used to seeing and laughing at.

I predict that there will be 5 other days which will more than make up for the 5 days with no negative PR whatsoever.

 

[guanoloco]

You may have a point there Victoria.

For anyone who doesn't know who those guys are, here's a story Tony Ortega did on them:

The new leaders of ‘Scientology’ tell us about their fight to free the world | The Underground Bunker

tonyortega.org

Scientology is just so....stupid! Where else gets this type of draw?

...hmmm...just think...I joined that group...

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

I predict that there will be 5 days in 2020 when the cofs will attract no negative PR whatsoever.

I know! It'll be mind blowing and announced as a huge win at one of those compulsory events ... things will very quickly return to normal though in 2021 when they will cop the full 365 days of self created dramatic and cringeworthy publicity that we have all grown so used to seeing and laughing at.

LOL, well in fact the Church of Scientology has already handled & erased problem of "Out PR". In the previous 2 decades they "spotted the source of the problem and made it vanish" by incarcerating all their senior management executives in cult prisons and firing all their church spokespersons.

The "why" for all COS PR flaps, it turns out, is that every time a Scientology representative talked to the media, it was recorded and later that recording got electronically alter-used so that it sounded like the spokesperson was lying their ass off.

This is all covered under Ron's IDEAL PR TECH that he successfully piloted from 1950-1986, when he refused to answer any questions after discovering that "Q & A (is) Man's Deadliest Disease".

Yes, there actually is sacred 'scripture' that forbids questions and answers.

Questions are not ideal in the ideal world of Scientology.

REASON: There is no time for questions in a universe that is going to cataclysmically self destruct in 5 years. It's just obviously much saner to simply clay demo r-factors and comply with orders. And to get rid of PR flaps by getting rid of PR people. Be sure to pick up the new book, "WHEN IN DOUBT, EX-COMMUNICATE!"

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[HelluvaHoax!]

guanoloco posted. . .

- - - - -


CULTIE IN CRISIS!
(thinking to self)
Let's see, I am bankrupt and homeless and I lost all my closest friends, family,
parents and children to disconnection. I am miserable. . . . . . . . . However, I have
scientific proof that I am actually a super-happy Humanitarian and Clear, because
because they don't just give these lapel pins, bracelets & trinkets away for free!
But actually, now that I think of it, it wasn't exactly free--I had to donate
the last 40 years of my life and over $600,000 to attain these statuses.
Hmmmmm.....I don't think my own church would lie to me and
defraud me like that, because LRH stated in the Way To
Happiness to never lie. So, I mean, he wouldn't lie
to me, only a liar would lie about not lying.
So---wait. The Commodore and COB
live like billionaires while I am
dead-ass broke. I mean...
Shit! Am I stupid?


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​

I hereby humbly tender the suggestion that "AM I STUPID?" is the actual Doubt Formula.

There are two (2) possible answers:

1. No, I am not stupid. I am OT. All that enturbulation is down there in the MEST universe that I have successfully "risen above".​

​

2. Yes, I am stupid! (followed by multi-year cringefest). ​

​

.​

 

[lotus]

I know for sure David Miscavige teamed with Bob Duggan to recruit a huuuuuuge thetan and launch a new WW expansion campaign.

Hint: Can't tell the name of the huge thetan, but the

Make Scientology great again​

campaign will be launch in 2020 for sure.

 

[freethinker]

There will be an OT egg hunt in the Grand Canyon where every page of OT IX and X will be hidden under rocks.