TOP SUPER-STUPID MOMENTS IN SCIENTOLOGY (PART V)

[HelluvaHoax!]

As long as Reyne mentioned (above) Dr. Hubbard's early years when he was doing R&D on mystically esoteric projects (e.g. "Babalon Working"), I'll include the following:

photo source link

During that period Ron was researching advanced Yoga positions
that transcended the limited case gain that was attainable from
"The Downward Dog" and other Yogic physical contortions. In
the turban-topped photo above, Ron discovered a more advanced
animal spirit ("The Upward Bird") which could be configured by
adjusting one's finger position during meditations. It also served
as a secret hand-signal from Ron to his Scientology donors.


.​

 

[Reyne Mayer]

I suppose the arduous and risky quest to find "magic" takes many forms. One invests ones time and resources for a suitably wondrous prize. Isn't that embedded at some level in human DNA. We see it in treasure hunts, panning for gold, drilling for oil, mining the ocean's bottom for sunken treasure, investing in the stock market or even buying some cryptocurrency. There is a thrill to risk taking for big jackpots—hence people buying lottery tickets or dropping big bucks in flashy casinos.

yes, exactly.

i think it's pretty well established at this point, that many behaviors and responses are innate, resulting among other things in what is now known as cognitive biases. they had group survival value when we were evolving in hunter-gatherer tribes, but are often counter-productive in complex technological societies.

LRH seems to have run up against this inconvenient truth and briefly attempted to address it with the 'genetic entitity', but quickly abandoned that bothersome challenge to his principal theory and pitch that the brain was infinitely (re)programmable. he then went on to exploit cognitive biases to recruit, retain, and manipulate followers, rather than educating (and freeing) people from what is arguably the closest actual mechanism to his theorized 'engrams' or 'implants'.

and it is possible compensate for those sorts of biases, much as pilots who learn to fly on instruments in zero visability train themselves to overcome the 'gut' instincts that can cause them to fly the plane into the ground (or to stall and fall to the ground) 'feeling' that is the right thing to to do.

ETA: this leads me to attempt some sort of further tie-in, such as describing scientology as a train wreck hit by a plane crash....
(and it that seems improbable, keep in mind that in one of the bizarre twists of scientology history, the ship Apollo was finally sunk, as it were, by being hit by a train)

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

yes, exactly.

i think it's pretty well established at this point, that many behaviors and responses are innate, resulting among other things in what is now known as cognitive biases. they had group survival value when we were evolving in hunter-gatherer tribes, but are often counter-productive in complex technological societies.

LRH seems to have run up against this inconvenient truth and briefly attempted to address it with the 'genetic entitity', but quickly abandoned that bothersome challenge to his principal theory and pitch that the brain was infinitely (re)programmable. he then went on to exploit cognitive biases to recruit, retain, and manipulate followers, rather than educating (and freeing) people from what is arguably the closest actual mechanism to his theorized 'engrams' or 'implants'.

and it is possible compensate for those sorts of biases, much as pilots who learn to fly on instruments in zero visability train themselves to overcome the 'gut' instincts that can cause them to fly the plane into the ground (or to stall and fall to the ground) 'feeling' that is the right thing to to do.

ETA: this leads me to attempt some sort of further tie-in, such as describing scientology as a train wreck hit by a plane crash....

View attachment 15605

NEURAL PATHWAYS RUN IT!
lol

.​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

INGENIOUS "RELIGIOUS ANGLE" GIMMICK PREVENTS VICTIMS OF SCIENTOLOGY'S
HARASSMENT, FRAUD, STALKING, TERRORISM & RAPE FROM SUING THE CULT
​

There are multiple other discussion threads on ESMB detailing the serial rape trials (criminal AND civil) of indicted serial rapist and Scientology celebrity Danny Masterson.

One of the many controversies swirling around the civil lawsuits involve the contracts the cult forces every single person who takes a course or receives spiritual counseling is forced to sign. These agreements, amongst many other treacheries, does not allow the victims of Scientology from seeking recourse in the civil courts by suing Scientology. Instead they must submit to a sham mandatory religious arbitration that is exclusively run from top to bottom with and by Scientologists. The utter absurdity of having the rapist and his OT buddies act as judge/jury is not only breathtaking—it's actually happening in the real world and the victims (thus far) appear powerless to not submit to the cult's sociopathically vengeful "justice" procedures.

Of particular note, a Scientology attorney was quoted in the Los Angeles Times with the following outrageous and astoundingly ludicrous "Big Lie".

"William Forman, a lawyer for Scientology, said its arbitration
agreements ensure '...people know what they are signing up for'.”

- - - ​

Shall we savor for a second that statement's surreal sleaziness?

CULT FACT #1: Every single day, hour, minute and second of Scientology's entire existence for the past 71 years has been fanatically dedicated to ensuring that people don't know what they are signing up for.​

​

CULT FACT #2: Actively preventing Scientologists from 'knowing how to know' the multitude of ways the cult is defrauding them is in fact the entire point and raison d'etre of Scientology's grade-chart governors & gurus in the first place! ​

.

 

[Bill]

.

INGENIOUS "RELIGIOUS ANGLE" GIMMICK PREVENTS VICTIMS OF SCIENTOLOGY'S
HARASSMENT, FRAUD, STALKING, TERRORISM & RAPE FROM SUING THE CULT​

<snip>

I just had this horrible idea: Is the Church of Scientology claiming that harassment, fraud, stalking, terrorism and rape are part of Scientology's "religious services" covered by their contract?

Yes, their contract does mention "any dispute, claim or controversy" but how can they claim this covers activity by someone outside of any Scientology service?

 

[guanoloco]

I just had this horrible idea: Is the Church of Scientology claiming that harassment, fraud, stalking, terrorism and rape are part of Scientology's "religious services" covered by their contract?

Yes, their contract does mention "any dispute, claim or controversy" but how can they claim this covers activity by someone outside of any Scientology service?

Specifically under contract law illegal activity nullifies any contract automatically.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

I just had this horrible idea: Is the Church of Scientology claiming that harassment, fraud, stalking, terrorism and rape are part of Scientology's "religious services" covered by their contract? Yes, their contract does mention "any dispute, claim or controversy" but how can they claim this covers activity by someone outside of any Scientology service?

.
ANSWER: Because "utterly destroying" DBs/SPs/Squirrels is not outside of any Scientology service. By all reasonable measures and metrics, delivering Fair Game is in fact a priceless Scientology religious service. It serves to engage the "gradients of ethics" in order to exert more pressure on the being than does their reactive mind—and thereby causing them to cease committing overts against Scientology it is then possible to use that window of opportunity to audit/train them, erase their evil purposes and thereby salvage their eternity. Scientology is, after all, "the only game in the universe where everyone wins!" Don't forget to clay demo the word "everyone". In such instances where a person has to be bankrupted, disconnected from their families, unjustifiably imprisoned or murdered, the targeted party is still winning big--notwithstanding the fact that we have not yet received their Success Story due to the devT of their having to bury their pets and/or go pick up a new body (for themselves) in the case that murdering them was determined to be the greatest good for their dynamics.





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[HelluvaHoax!]

.

Reyne Mayer posted these two (2) photos. . .

- - - - -



There are just sooooooo many things wrong at sooooooo many levels with
both of those freakin' creepfest photos! Don't make me come down there! *



* down there: whichever mest-universe, dive-bar-esque
slave-planet you're down there partying at.

.


.​

 

[ILove2Lurk]

. . . rather ingenious marketing methods to sell his transformative formulae in spite of the obvious fact that it never worked.

Like the prolific Manly P. Hall, Ron followed a successful action of many in the spiritual or
religious writing and lecturing realm who came before him in the 1900's. Hall published
his first major work, the 700-page The Secret Teachings of All Ages in 1928, followed by
thousands of lectures, including two at Carnegie Hall, and over 150 written volumes, many
of which were quite well researched. Manly P. Hall could go on stage and talk for hours broadly
and with extraordinary detail without written notes. Quite a few of his audio talks on YouTube
are remarkably interesting and informative. (if you're into that kinda thing.)

Though Hall spoke with authority about the immortality of man and reincarnation, toward the
end of his life he was wandering around nervously asking others if there's life after death. Oh, well,
all that "certainty" evaporating.

That said, by writing many thick books and delivering thousands of hours of authoritative lectures,
one can create the apparency that there is something there, where there is not. This is a time tested
formula going back for ages. You see a whole lot of gibberish in books written by university professors.
Many books say nothing and accomplish nothing, but it sure seems like there MUST be something there.

It all boils down to thick books. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

​

 

[Reyne Mayer]

Like the prolific Manly P. Hall, Ron followed a successful action of many in the spiritual or
religious writing and lecturing realm who came before him in the 1900's.

thanks for the historical reminder of a surprisingly prolific (and diverse) era that somehow, amazingly, became forgotten -- particularly by those who (a generation or two later) bought into Hubbard's 'work' as something entirely new.

Edgar Cayce the 'sleeping phrophet' recorded thousands of cases (using techniques similar to what Hubbard would later call 'reverie', that of course produced supposed memories of past lives) not just a couple hundred -- and established an institute in the 1930s where you can, actually, really, come and see for yourself, including the original 'research' {such as it is}:

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

There is another discussion thread on ESMB entitled:

People who go nuts after having
been declared a Suppressive Person​

This inspires the possibility for other related new threads, such as. . .

Humans who go nuts after having
been declared a DB (i.e. Human) upon their
first visit to a Scientololgy org. They go crazy
because after that "r-factor", they frantically flail about
for the next half-century or more in a ludicrously vain effort
to gain magical godlike powers by mystically evolving
from a degraded human into a miraculously powered OT.
​

It's one of the great paradoxes in the cult of Scientology that when a DB comes into an org, they are promptly sent back out on a spiritual scavenger hunt in which they are ordered to go earn, borrow or otherwise retrieve money from the MEST universe and bring it back to the OTs inside the org. Nobody bothers to explain why the OTs are not able to use their own OT powers to get the needed cash—but must instead task degraded beings to solve the OTs' cashflow problems.

CONCLUSION: Ordering a DB (Degraded Being) to evolve upwards to the advanced state of OT has substantially less likelihood of success than ordering a CB (Chimpanzee Being) to evolve upwards to the advanced state of Homo Sapiens. Because when CBs are shown the grade chart and told it will cost them $600,000, they just run out of the org and back into the jungle—laughing and swinging through the trees.

.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

Imagine for a moment that... ​

Hubbard's tech had worked and ordinary homo sapiens ("DBs") evolved upward to the advanced state of homo novis. And this spread like wildfire to the animal kingdom where ordinary chimpanzees began evolving upward to the advanced state of homo sapiens! It wouldn't be long before operating chimps established their own COS (Church of Simianology) and began building ideal orgs to move their species up the Bridge! Let's take a peek inside the org now!

LETTER REG UNIT

Carl, our Chief Letter Registrar, is bleary-eyed after pulling off
29 all-nighters in a row to boom the letters-out stat and flood
new chimp bodies into the org. Carl stated, "I have total certainty
that I set a Guinness Record by typing 31,197 letters over that
month. However, quite unfortunately, after the 2nd day I dozed
off and later someone later wrote a KR on me claiming that I typed
all those letters without inserting any sheets in the paper-feed.


SOURCE & FOUNDER OF CHIMPOLOGY

OUR COMMODORE
LAFAYETTE "HAIRY LARRY" HUBBARD​

.

 

[Chuck J.]

Like the prolific Manly P. Hall, Ron followed a successful action of many in the spiritual or
religious writing and lecturing realm who came before him in the 1900's. Hall published
his first major work, the 700-page The Secret Teachings of All Ages in 1928, followed by
thousands of lectures, including two at Carnegie Hall, and over 150 written volumes, many
of which were quite well researched. Manly P. Hall could go on stage and talk for hours broadly
and with extraordinary detail without written notes. Quite a few of his audio talks on YouTube
are remarkably interesting and informative. (if you're into that kinda thing.)

Though Hall spoke with authority about the immortality of man and reincarnation, toward the
end of his life he was wandering around nervously asking others if there's life after death. Oh, well,
all that "certainty" evaporating.

That said, by writing many thick books and delivering thousands of hours of authoritative lectures,
one can create the apparency that there is something there, where there is not. This is a time tested
formula going back for ages. You see a whole lot of gibberish in books written by university professors.
Many books say nothing and accomplish nothing, but it sure seems like there MUST be something there.

It all boils down to thick books. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

​

Inside every thick book is a slim book struggling to get out.

 

[Chuck J.]

.

Imagine for a moment that... ​

Hubbard's tech had worked and ordinary homo sapiens ("DBs") evolved upward to the advanced state of homo novis. And this spread like wildfire to the animal kingdom where ordinary chimpanzees began evolving upward to the advanced state of homo sapiens! It wouldn't be long before operating chimps established their own COS (Church of Simianology) and began building ideal orgs to move their species up the Bridge! Let's take a peek inside the org now!

LETTER REG UNIT

Carl, our Chief Letter Registrar, is bleary-eyed after pulling off
29 all-nighters in a row to boom the letters-out stat and flood
new chimp bodies into the org. Carl stated, "I have total certainty
that I set a Guinness Record by typing 31,197 letters over that
month. However, quite unfortunately, after the 2nd day I dozed
off and later someone later wrote a KR on me claiming that I typed
all those letters without inserting any sheets in the paper-feed.


SOURCE & FOUNDER OF CHIMPOLOGY

OUR COMMODORE
LAFAYETTE "HAIRY LARRY" HUBBARD​

.

Sea Org. Animal Org.
If you get posted there you're in for a lot of sweeping up dookie.
It's CO is DM's dog. Captain Dog to you!

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.
original article and survey linked at THE UNDERGROUND BUNKER
discussion linked at ESMB THREAD
.

The following SURVEY QUESTIONS are actually taken verbatim
from a real survey that COS International Management is running!
(my answers are legit too!)

- - -
​

Which management terminals do you listen to?
The ones that blew and now tell the truth.

Which management terminals do you like hearing from at events or seminars?
The ones who expose church lies & fraud that are intended to create a world WITH insanity, WITH war and WITH criminality.

Which Flag terminals do look up to?
The ones in heaven--like Ron. Because he's "up" there at the top of all the charts, conditions, OT levels, tone levels and scales.

Which Flag terminals would you like hearing from at events or seminars?
A guest speaker—the world's leading attorney on class action suits and refunds.

What past events or seminars inspired you the most?
The worldwide event when Ron died. That inspired all of us and gave us hope that one day Miscavige might die as well.

.
.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

from another discussion thread
"David Mayo wanted to discontinue OT II and OT III"
- - -​

.

.
. . . thanks for some very intriguing posts but they raise some questions for me. The main one for me is; what in your view is "case?" I've seen some people here say that they don't think it exists at all.
.

.
Alas! The answer to that question lies echelons above the life-threatening top secret clearances required to learn of the volcanically confidential Xenu OT III materials!

As with all Scientological questions, there are minimally and always at least two (2) different and contradictory answers.

WHAT IS CASE?​

ANSWER #1: (see Scientology technology's 10M words describing the various kinds of engrams, implants and other mental/spiritual "charge" that unwittingly forces "aberration" and/or degradation upon an individual, which then brings about stress, anxiety, misemotion, physical and/or psychosomatic pain, illness and an encyclopedic catalogue of various forms of earthly and eternal suffering)


ANSWER #2 (confidential): Case is any major or micro non-ideal manifestation in a person's life, which (had the being not foolishly lost or previously abandoned their miraculous wholetrack godlike OT powers) would ideally not have occurred. The definitive diagnostic determination whether any instance of imperfection in a person's life is due to their "case" (or merely due to the inherent immutably imperfect characteristics of the physical universe) is based upon this principle: If a person can be convinced to believe that paying money and receiving auditing can change any known imperfection in their existence, such would be scientific confirmation that they have identified the "case" condition that is ruining their lives and which is easily resolvable within a few short hours us applying Dr. Hubbard's technological discoveries.


.

 

[Reyne Mayer]

Wounded war hero Commodore L. Ron Hubbard says 'a couple of holes in me – they wouldn’t heal'
= chronic stomach ulcers of a malingering REMF in the MEST world

as with the Hubbard Law of Commotion, i think we need a name for that particular type of Hubbard-style lying that he did that all the time and that now his followers do too, say something that is technically true in a very limited way, but which in context is effectively false in the way it is almost certainly going to be taken. it's something childish that kids often experiment with at a certain developmental point -- and typically mature out of.





but the Commodore must have been rightfully entitled to all those war hero medals in the frame over on the far right, because no one in their right mind would ever sit with the evidence of stolen valor claims in front of them day in and day out, would they?

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

.

as with the Hubbard Law of Commotion, i think we need a name for that particular type of Hubbard-style lying that he did that all the time and that now his followers do too, say something that is technically true in a very limited way, but which in context is effectively false in the way it is almost certainly going to be taken. it's something childish that kids often experiment with at a certain developmental point -- and typically mature out of.

.

That is an excellent challenge!

It will likely require extensive wholetrack research and dozens of creative committees.

In my experience, finding a name for any new thing (business, product, et al) always begins with a list where every possible candidate or idea is thrown on there whether it sucks or not. lol

I will contribute the first possible name for the brand of LYING that Hubbard specialized in.

I think it might have something to do with the concept of "ALTER-IS".

Adapted for Hubbard's peculiar style here is the first one:

ALTER-WHIZZING. ​

It's a portmanteau that combines "pissing into the wind" which then perhaps suggests a vernacular update - "whizzing into the wind".

I am very dissatisfied with that candidate, mainly because it requires an explanation. lol

We shall all endeavor to find a suitable term for Hubbard's manipulatively suggestive lying gimmick that you so aptly described!

.

 

[Chuck J.]

Wounded war hero Commodore L. Ron Hubbard says 'a couple of holes in me – they wouldn’t heal'
= chronic stomach ulcers of a malingering REMF in the MEST world

as with the Hubbard Law of Commotion, i think we need a name for that particular type of Hubbard-style lying that he did that all the time and that now his followers do too, say something that is technically true in a very limited way, but which in context is effectively false in the way it is almost certainly going to be taken. it's something childish that kids often experiment with at a certain developmental point -- and typically mature out of.



View attachment 15853

but the Commodore must have been rightfully entitled to all those war hero medals in the frame over on the far right, because no one in their right mind would ever sit with the evidence of stolen valor claims in front of them day in and day out, would they?

View attachment 15854

Was in the USAF for 50 months in peacetime, 1978-'82, pretty funny to me that I have one more ribbon (5) than Hubbard was actually entitled to. Found that out after I read his actual war record. lol. Like Hubbard, mine are all Unit Citations, i.e. not individual awards. Except for one. I qualified on the M-16 and got a marksman award because I had such a high score (it was a complete accident). Never ceases to crack me up. I'm a HERO !!!

Oh, and I got severe food poisoning one time in the chow hall, puked my guts out all day, when nothing was left to puke up I had dry heaves. I deserve a Purple Heart for that!


My entry is: Hubbardian Fact Distortion.

 

[Reyne Mayer]

Was in the USAF for 50 months in peacetime, 1978-'82, pretty funny to me that I have one more ribbon (5) than Hubbard was actually entitled to. Found that out after I read his actual war record. lol. Like Hubbard, mine are all Unit Citations, i.e. not individual awards. Except for one. I qualified on the M-16 and got a marksman award because I had such a high score (it was a complete accident). Never ceases to crack me up. I'm a HERO

thanks, that puts it in perspective.

my understanding is that LRH didn't even get some of the good conduct medals he should have been eligible for, because he never went long enough without disciplinary action.

My entry is: Hubbardian Fact Distortion.

definitely on the right track there!