Stories about stupid KRs - redux

Karakorum

The most just, the most merciful, the most ethical
As for some time KRs from the whole continent went through me and our squad's CRM program, I remember quite a few. Let me start by quoting myself from the the old boards and add a few more I recalled since:


1. A wife wrote a KR on a husband for not showing her enough affection.
2. Two guys renting one room wrote KRs at one another accusing the other guy of stealing food. I came to the conclusion that the motel has rats.
3. A KR about a stolen replacement e-meter. Turns out the device in question had simply not arrived yet.
4. A KR against a woman accused of too flashy makeup. this got "escalated" and in the end I had to hold what amounted to a symposium explaining what makeup is good and which is verbotten. Crazy. I wanted to kill the woman that made that KR. So much wasted time and effort.
5. A KR about an auditor who threw insults at LRH as a flunk-inducing strategy during bullbaiting (oh that one flew really high and escalated outside my reach. I think he got kicked out in the end. Lucky guy.)
6. A KR accusing a guy of non-scn practices. Turns out guy was talking about tectonics.
7. A wife wrote a KR against her husband accusing him of planning to blow. She defected the next week herself.
8. A KR against a female auditor who burst out in uncontrollable laughter during some OT thing and fell down from her chair and spent something like 10 minutes laughing and rolling on the floor. The one filing felt he will need to pay for the lost time.
9. One where a recruiter accused another one of stealing his recruits.
10. A KR against a guy who she accused of pouring salt into her coffee.
11. A guy KRed his two buddies. They were arguing about something and quoting LRH at one another to prove their point. Dude KRed them because he felt confused after the discussion.
12. A lass KRed a guy because he said he wants to squeeze her boobs.
13. A KR against some person because he wouldn't explain some LHR quote and instead told her to "read the fucking text again".
14. KR against an MAA who told an SO member to "stop acting like a fucking gaylord", while both were standing in front of several preclears.
15. A ton of KRs on people who discussed ideas on how to use OT abilities in inapropriate ways.
16. A KR accusing a guy of trying to sabotage the org by 'speaking Spanish with a stupid accent'. I had to investigate that one and tried my best to do it with a straight face.
17. A KR against a staff member who was on some sort of cleaning duty, when confronted about something by another person in that org, she pulled down her pants and told him he can kiss her ass (Upon investigation, it turned out she was piss drunk, nobody could explain how she smuggled the booze in).
18. Registrars writing KRs complaining that people are cheap.
19. A KR war between some people from ASHOD and ASHOF accusing one another of leaving the place a mess (both were correct imho).
20. A KR against a guy for using the term "Old Era Dianetics".
21. A KR for a typo one girl made in a message. The typo was: "Ron L. Bubbard".
22. A guy got a KR suggesting that he made an "obscene" figure at clay demo during a Pro TR.
 

Karen#1

Well-known member
In the cult, KRS can be used for BLACK PROPAGANDA campaigns to propagate malicious data about a given target. This only ends up costing $$$$$$ more and more $$$$$ for sec checks.

Approximately true sample to make the point:

RTC REPORTS OFFICER
Julian Schwartz AOLA MAA
External Security Chief OSA INT
External Security Sits Handling Off OSA INT
Senior CS AOLA
NOTS CS AOLA
FSO Senior CS
FSO Ls CS
Senior CS WUS
Freewinds MAA
Freewinds CS

I am reporting that my husband went to a topless dance club with a bunch of businessmen who knew he was an OT 5 Scientologist.
This is bad PR for the Church.

He also put cash in the pole dancing girl's bikini.

ML

This is true

XXXXXXXXXXXX
 
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PirateAndBum

Administrator
Staff member

Xenu Xenu Xenu

Well-known member
As for some time KRs from the whole continent went through me and our squad's CRM program, I remember quite a few. Let me start by quoting myself from the the old boards and add a few more I recalled since:


1. A wife wrote a KR on a husband for not showing her enough affection.
2. Two guys renting one room wrote KRs at one another accusing the other guy of stealing food. I came to the conclusion that the motel has rats.
3. A KR about a stolen replacement e-meter. Turns out the device in question had simply not arrived yet.
4. A KR against a woman accused of too flashy makeup. this got "escalated" and in the end I had to hold what amounted to a symposium explaining what makeup is good and which is verbotten. Crazy. I wanted to kill the woman that made that KR. So much wasted time and effort.
5. A KR about an auditor who threw insults at LRH as a flunk-inducing strategy during bullbaiting (oh that one flew really high and escalated outside my reach. I think he got kicked out in the end. Lucky guy.)
6. A KR accusing a guy of non-scn practices. Turns out guy was talking about tectonics.
7. A wife wrote a KR against her husband accusing him of planning to blow. She defected the next week herself.
8. A KR against a female auditor who burst out in uncontrollable laughter during some OT thing and fell down from her chair and spent something like 10 minutes laughing and rolling on the floor. The one filing felt he will need to pay for the lost time.
9. One where a recruiter accused another one of stealing his recruits.
10. A KR against a guy who she accused of pouring salt into her coffee.
11. A guy KRed his two buddies. They were arguing about something and quoting LRH at one another to prove their point. Dude KRed them because he felt confused after the discussion.
12. A lass KRed a guy because he said he wants to squeeze her boobs.
13. A KR against some person because he wouldn't explain some LHR quote and instead told her to "read the fucking text again".
14. KR against an MAA who told an SO member to "stop acting like a fucking gaylord", while both were standing in front of several preclears.
15. A ton of KRs on people who discussed ideas on how to use OT abilities in inapropriate ways.
16. A KR accusing a guy of trying to sabotage the org by 'speaking Spanish with a stupid accent'. I had to investigate that one and tried my best to do it with a straight face.
17. A KR against a staff member who was on some sort of cleaning duty, when confronted about something by another person in that org, she pulled down her pants and told him he can kiss her ass (Upon investigation, it turned out she was piss drunk, nobody could explain how she smuggled the booze in).
18. Registrars writing KRs complaining that people are cheap.
19. A KR war between some people from ASHOD and ASHOF accusing one another of leaving the place a mess (both were correct imho).
20. A KR against a guy for using the term "Old Era Dianetics".
21. A KR for a typo one girl made in a message. The typo was: "Ron L. Bubbard".
22. A guy got a KR suggesting that he made an "obscene" figure at clay demo during a Pro TR.

Knowledge Reports for all occasions. Some of them were silly, some were scary, some were ridiculous. Just another day in Scientologyland.

It is my opinion that Knowledge Reports turn every Scientologist into spies for LRH. With Hubbard dead, Scientologists are spies for Scientology Inc. Most of the time they are not so much spies as they are snitches for the great Scientology cause and the great dead Hubbard.

I don't know if I have any point to make. But, like all things in Scientology, it's all about supporting and protecting Scientology. Therefore, Knowledge Reports are awful just like Scientology is awful.
 

programmer_guy

True ex-Scientologist
A long time ago, Aaron Smith-Levin did a video where he mentioned the huge amount of KRs he wrote when he was in the Sea Org.

I tried to find that video but couldn't yet find it.
 

Karakorum

The most just, the most merciful, the most ethical
A long time ago, Aaron Smith-Levin did a video where he mentioned the huge amount of KRs he wrote when he was in the Sea Org.

I tried to find that video but couldn't yet find it.
I remember some of his KRs, but mostly as "attachments" to history files of some of the ASHO people that we had under investigation.
The impression I had back in the day was: "a bit annoying, but not malicious". He would make unnecessary repetitions and sometimes beat around the bush, I ended up feeling like he could have made his KRs half as long without losing any deatials.

But its been years and maybe that's just the way I remember things now, rather than what it was in reality. It honestly feels like a lifetime away.
 

freethinker

Controversial
Many KR's are stupid because they don't follow policy. KR's are written for investigations already under way, not to start one.

If I were still in I would write a Things that Shouldn't be.

It would look like this:

Things that shouldn't be

Scientology

This is True,

Ex
 

Karakorum

The most just, the most merciful, the most ethical
Many KR's are stupid because they don't follow policy. KR's are written for investigations already under way, not to start one.
<snip>
If that was followed, we would all have had much less workload back in the day.

Honestly, the tongue-in-cheek mindset at Inv was that "everyone is under investigation, we just didn't get around to starting some of them". Oh and certainly every piece of minuite data about any scn member (living, dead and in between) has to be gathered, written down, filed and kept for all eternity.
 

Vumba

Active member
As for some time KRs from the whole continent went through me and our squad's CRM program, I remember quite a few. Let me start by quoting myself from the the old boards and add a few more I recalled since:


1. A wife wrote a KR on a husband for not showing her enough affection.
2. Two guys renting one room wrote KRs at one another accusing the other guy of stealing food. I came to the conclusion that the motel has rats.
3. A KR about a stolen replacement e-meter. Turns out the device in question had simply not arrived yet.
4. A KR against a woman accused of too flashy makeup. this got "escalated" and in the end I had to hold what amounted to a symposium explaining what makeup is good and which is verbotten. Crazy. I wanted to kill the woman that made that KR. So much wasted time and effort.
5. A KR about an auditor who threw insults at LRH as a flunk-inducing strategy during bullbaiting (oh that one flew really high and escalated outside my reach. I think he got kicked out in the end. Lucky guy.)
6. A KR accusing a guy of non-scn practices. Turns out guy was talking about tectonics.
7. A wife wrote a KR against her husband accusing him of planning to blow. She defected the next week herself.
8. A KR against a female auditor who burst out in uncontrollable laughter during some OT thing and fell down from her chair and spent something like 10 minutes laughing and rolling on the floor. The one filing felt he will need to pay for the lost time.
9. One where a recruiter accused another one of stealing his recruits.
10. A KR against a guy who she accused of pouring salt into her coffee.
11. A guy KRed his two buddies. They were arguing about something and quoting LRH at one another to prove their point. Dude KRed them because he felt confused after the discussion.
12. A lass KRed a guy because he said he wants to squeeze her boobs.
13. A KR against some person because he wouldn't explain some LHR quote and instead told her to "read the fucking text again".
14. KR against an MAA who told an SO member to "stop acting like a fucking gaylord", while both were standing in front of several preclears.
15. A ton of KRs on people who discussed ideas on how to use OT abilities in inapropriate ways.
16. A KR accusing a guy of trying to sabotage the org by 'speaking Spanish with a stupid accent'. I had to investigate that one and tried my best to do it with a straight face.
17. A KR against a staff member who was on some sort of cleaning duty, when confronted about something by another person in that org, she pulled down her pants and told him he can kiss her ass (Upon investigation, it turned out she was piss drunk, nobody could explain how she smuggled the booze in).
18. Registrars writing KRs complaining that people are cheap.
19. A KR war between some people from ASHOD and ASHOF accusing one another of leaving the place a mess (both were correct imho).
20. A KR against a guy for using the term "Old Era Dianetics".
21. A KR for a typo one girl made in a message. The typo was: "Ron L. Bubbard".
22. A guy got a KR suggesting that he made an "obscene" figure at clay demo during a Pro TR.
When I got into trouble on the Apollo when I was a child, it was because I was assigned to file a mountainous backlog of KRs, and instead I shredded them all. Looks like I did the MAA (and the victims) a huge favour! 🤪
 

Karakorum

The most just, the most merciful, the most ethical
When I got into trouble on the Apollo when I was a child, it was because I was assigned to file a mountainous backlog of KRs, and instead I shredded them all. Looks like I did the MAA (and the victims) a huge favour! 🤪
I'm pretty sure deep down the MAA was glad. He got rid of the work, did not have to check all the bs accusations and best of all - some other poor shmuck did it for him and took the blame.


Deleting or destroying data was seen as an act of radical sabotage back in my day. Being assigned to lower conditions would be the very mildest of possible outcomes. Getting kicked out of the church or assigned to the RPF would not be out of the question, depending on the importance of said data.

Data was holy and never ever ever to be destroyed. Example:
We had digitized transcripts of 20 year old confessionals that have been originally recorded on 8mm tapes. Some dead souls must have been assigned to listen to all these tapes, then manually type all of the dialogue into our CRM. Just one more illustration how the church always find ways to waste the work-time of its staff and SO.
 
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