Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis Hire Jared Fogel to be Danny Masterson’s Friend in Prison

[J. Swift]

“We just wanted to help our dear friend Danny Masterson,” announced Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis at a Los Angeles press conference.

“And so we hired inmate Jared Fogel to be Danny’s friend when Danny is shipped off to prison.

“We like Jared because, like Danny, Jared has never used drugs. Indeed, during his many years as spokesman for Subway, Jared told everyone he met that drugs were dangerous.

“We also believe that, like Danny, the importance of Jared’s anti-drug message is what the public should know about.

“This is not to lessen the seriousness of what Jared did. We very much believe in the jury system to a certain extent.

“We hope we have not retraumatized Jared’s victims by hiring him to be Danny’s friend in prison. But if we did we are really truly quite sorry.”

 

[guanoloco]

 

[Churchill]

SCIENTOLOGY IS RADIOACTIVE

Ashton Kutcher Steps Down as Board Chair of Anti-Child-Sex-Abuse Organization

His resignation comes amid backlash over his support of Danny Masterson

time.com

 

[Enthetan]

I have no doubt that several large inmates (and a few guards) are getting paid to ensure Danny stays safe in prison.

 

[I M Dex]

I have no doubt that several large inmates (and a few guards) are getting paid to ensure Danny stays safe in prison.

I hope he stays safe in prison for the rest of his life.